Yesterday a student in 12 Months To Mastery ( My year long coaching program) was asking me how I can be so confident in making life decisions, especially when it came to moving to new cities or cutting people out of my life.
I had rarely verbalized what I do mentally in these situations, but internally I've known for a long time.
I call it "Flipping The Switch".
Once I decide that some person, place, or thing is unhealthy for me, I immediately cut them or it out of my life. Like that person, idea, belief etc, was fucking cancer. You know what you don't do with cancer? You don't talk to it or try to get it to change. You get rid of it ASAP. All traces of it, so that your body looks as much as possible like it was never even there. Then you try to forget it as quickly as you can.
That can sound really harsh, I know.
But I think about it like this, life is short and uncertain. Any one of us could live to be 100 or, get hit by a bus tomorrow. Life is too short to deal with people, places or things within your control that don't make you not just happy, but ecstatically happy. You owe it to yourself, to respect yourself enough to not put up with bad situations and hope that someone else will come in and save you.
You have a lot more control over your circumstances than most people want to believe, and you don't have to settle.
You can always flip the switch and start again.
Have a great weekend.
S
Friday, July 17, 2009
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Great ass kicking for anyone. Move your life, buddies !
ReplyDeletegreat as usual. Too bad not many other instructors teach this, not just in game but I mean self-help as well.
ReplyDeletegreat post anyway bud!
this is a great post.
ReplyDeleteI'd had this happen just recently with a friend of mine who just tried to manipulate me and tried to fuck me over.
I said something like 'If that are your beliefs and if that's the way you threat your friends, then that's it. I'm not going to hate you and shit, but from now on we're no longer friends. I just don't allow this kind of thing in my life.'
great article, thanks sinn
ReplyDeletei noticed you're reading a lot of new material right now, especially more scientific stuff rooted in psychology.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.des.emory.edu/mfp/BanEncy.html
check this out, jon! it's pure gold and the only reason i got good at game.
i'd love you to create a blog around that someday and read what you think of it.
best,
tim
Hmm, if only there was an easy way to know what aspects of your life are Cancer...
ReplyDeleteAs for moving to a bunch of different cities, not really sure how this advice is relevant..