Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Rule # 7 : Always End Interaction First

Here's a good piece of advice that many guys(including myself sometimes) don't take.

Whenever you're interacting with a woman, whether it's the first time you meet her, through the phone, or on a date you should always end the interaction first.

This does a few things:

1. It may end the interaction before she wants it to end leaving her wanting more but not getting it.

2. It shows you are a busy guy creating scarcity.

3. Most importantly it keeps you from looking like the needy guy hanging on to the conversation with a girl for as long as he possibly can.

You don't need to be rude about it, but a simple "Oh man I totally have to run" can be used to end any conversation.

And if you've been running good game then you should already have her phone number or have set up a date well before the conversation starts to linger creating the perfect time for an exit.

Hope that helps,

JS

Monday, February 27, 2012

Eye Contact

Eye contact is a tricky subject, for 2 reasons:

1. It's a pretty important "Basic" skill. Without making good eye contact, it is very hard to display confidence and you can end up looking insecure, or worse shady.

2. There's no such thing as "SEDUCTIVE" eye contact. Eye contact is important but it's not like you're going to figure out some sort of Rasputin-y eye contact magic that makes girls fall in love with you just by looking at them.

So how do we bring these two ideas into alignment?

Pretty easily actually, eye contact is MOST important on the approach, you want to make nice, comfortable eye contact with the girl/group you are approaching.

When I say nice comfortable eye contact I mean holding EC for at least 1-2 seconds before looking away. Generally you want to hold EC until the girl looks away but you want to avoid staring as that is creepy, so never hold the EC for longer than 3 seconds without looking away.

Another way to use EC is as an emphasis. If in Attraction I want to make a point, I can double up on eye contact as I'm talking. Generally as you're talking you want to make and break eye contact on that 1-3 second pattern.

With a group it's necessary to spread the EC out with the entire group rather than just stare at one girl the whole time.

To get more advanced you can start to think about what different kinds of looks you could use with EC for example giving a woman a funny look is very different than a sexy look but both require strong EC to make happen.

Hope that helps.

JS

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Brainstorming: Ways To Convey Direct Interest

Lately, I've been talking about this idea of expressing direct (Non qualification based) interest in a girl early in the interaction as a way of

A. Defining the pickup for the girl. A lot of the time when you approach a girl especially if you're using an indirect opener the girl is unsure of what the interaction is, by using direct interest early, the girl knows you're interested in her romantically/sexually.

B. Escalating the interaction.

So here's my admittedly incomplete list of ways to express this direct interest in a competent way (as opposed to telling a girl she's hot or has great tits).

1. Why I like you statements. These are compliments that are framed as being the main reason or a main reason for your interest in her.

2. Statements of intent. The grandfather of direct interest. There are some really interesting Old, old, old school (like 2001) posts by a guy named Neo-Rio on ASF about SOIs solid stuff. I've also talked about them extensively on the Seduction Roadmap. SOIs are exactly what they sound like you give the girl a statement of what you are going to try to do.

3. Making plans/Asking her out. This is where normal guys do it right. Asking a girl out early ( as long as you don't get her phone # and leave in 3 mins) is a good way to demonstrate that you want to see her again and you're interested in dating her.

4. Relationship ?s. This is a technique I created after watching Captain Jack. Relationship questions like "Are you the jealous type" serve to frame the interaction in a romantic context. You would never ask a girl if she was he jealous type of girl unless you were considering her for a relationship and thus interest is very subtly expressed.

5. Assuming/Talking about a relationship. When you assume a relationship (even in a jokey role-playing way) you are expressing interest.

So those are 5 ways I came up with sitting around last night.

If you have any others leave them in the comments and I'll re-visit this topic sometime soon.

JS- The King Of Content

Monday, February 20, 2012

Response To A Great Comment

I usually don't pay much attention to the comments on this blog, I skim them to see if it's more of a " How Do I attract girls" overly simplified question that I have 100% answered in a million blog posts/products/talks or if it's more in the vein of the " I hope you die, cause you suck so much I take time out of my day to read your blog." variety.

Either way as Jim Rome used to say More of me and less of your comments makes for a better blog.

But there was an exception a few days ago on my long rambling diatribe about hitting on girls by a commenter named Mike.

Mike actually had a specific question and was able to actually think through the problem himself and present some different ideas about what might be happening (Hint if you want my advice be more specific, rather than asking how to pick up hot girls)

Mike's comment was as follows:

Thanks for the post!

One thing was unclear to me, can someone help me here: what are good and bad responses after you hitting on her = a statement of intent?
my guess is below - please correct / expand:

good reaction:
- her being happy for the statement like smiling
- her testing you (eg 'do you say this to all girls?'

bad reaction:
- trying to brush your statement off ('don't say such silly thing')
- her making effort making conversation non-sexual / business-like (?)
- mentioning her boyfriend?
- ignore? - if she smiles this is not ignore, is it.
- her looking uncomfortable
- her going away / ending conversation


Pretty much right on, but I will add a few things.

When you hit on girls no response is a good response. This is what I call passive acceptance, and it's a major factor in escalation. Most of the time girls will not react to escalation beyond laughing or smiling, so no reaction is a good reaction.

As for the bad responses, you pretty much nailed it, except obviously her ignoring the statement could be a good sign. Everything else is pretty right on.

The truth is it's NOT that hard to figure it out. The reason guys think they have trouble is because they want to ignore reality. They want the dream, that even tho the girl is obviously not interested and giving them a bad reaction that they are somehow just misreading the situation when usually the girl is simply not into you.

Hope that helps Mike and everyone else,

JS- The King Of Content

Friday, February 17, 2012

Creating and Passing Women's Tests

Hey there,

Today I want to talk to about the idea of creating and passing a woman's tests in order to create attraction.

That's right I said creating tests. One of the easiest and most predictable way to get attraction is through passing a woman's tests.

The reasons are pretty simple, tests engage a woman's emotions, plus she has to be somewhat interested in order to test you in the first place.

Tests have gotten a somewhat bad reputation in the SUISC but in reality they are conditional indicators of interest. Think of them as a woman saying I'll be attracted to you if you answer this the right way.

But what if a woman doesn't test you?

While it's true that you can come in and create so much attraction a woman doesn't even try to test you and is just interested (In fact that's what I usually try to do myself) but what happens when you don't get attraction and the woman isn't testing you?

The answer is apathy, and apathy is the real enemy of pick-up.

So to avoid apathy and keep a woman emotionally engaged we simply need to create tests for ourselves and then pass them.

This is the newest stuff I've been working in field and it's REALLY helped my game especially when looked at in the context of creating and passing tests as a way to sexually escalate.

SO how do we create tests?

1. Cocky and Funny. If you overdo the cocky and funny most women will test you. You can also just be cocky and that prompt tests as well. The idea here is to say something so outrageous that the woman feels prompted to call you on it giving you an opportunity to pass that test.

2. Player Game. Talking about how you're dating lots of girls or have 8 Gfs, are a porn star, etc. Will prompt testing.

3. Obvious Lies/messing with her. Telling girls you're a virgin, a porn star, celibate, or other obvious lies/messing with her type statements will cause tests.

4. Pushbacks. This is where you brand the girl with an unflattering stereotype like being prude, not getting out much, being old fashioned, etc will cause her to pushback against it and test you.

5. Arguing. When in doubt you can create a test by arguing with the girl about something. Be sure to do this about something trivial, and not something the girl is really invested in. If her favorite movie is Harry Potter arguing about how stupid wizards are is not gonna gain you points even if you "pass" the test technically.

When it comes to passing tests you want to stick to the holy 3 of

1. Agreeing and exaggerating
2. Going silly- tickling her, singing, mocking her,
3. 4th grade comebacks- I know you are but what am i, your mom, etc..

So that's one thing to do in attraction as an overall strategy when you're not sure what else to do.

Boo ya

JS-The King Of Content

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

You're Leading her to a decision Not a yes....

This is one of the key realizations you need to make in order to actually start having success with women.

Your goal is not to lead a girl to a yes, necessarily but rather to lead her to make a decision about whether or not she wants you to hit on her.

If a girl won't let you hit on her or accept it, you're shit out of luck for turning that into anything romantic or sexual.

So the way to think about opening, social comfort, and attraction is that the goal is to lead her to a decision about whether or not she's interested in being hit on before you start to qualify her, as there is no point in trying to qualify a girl who isn't interested in you hitting on her.

How do you do this?

With what I'm tentatively calling direct interest. Direct interest is basically telling the girl you like her without qualifying WHY you like her as you will do in qualification. With direct interest you're tipping your cap and letting her know you like her by hitting on her.

The girl will either accept this or reject it at which point you can either qualify or move on.

JS- The King Of Content

Monday, February 13, 2012

Some thoughts on hitting on girls...

I'm on the verge of being able to really articulate what I'm trying to say here, but it's not quite right, so bare with me as I dump some thoughts I've been having specifically about hitting on girls.

Mystery created some really good stuff, but he also really fucked a lot of people (myself included) up with the idea of being indirect. And to be clear I don't think he did it intentionally, or even that being indirect NEVER works. The reason the whole indirect thing fucked people up was that people equated being indirect with OPENING with an indirect opener.

In my experience there is a big difference in the grey area between starting a conversation with an indirect comment or opener and actively going out of your way to NOT show any interest in the girl. And don't even get me started on negging and "active disinterest".

So the first point here is that Opening direct and demonstrating direct interest are not the same thing. You can start a conversation indirectly with anything and then at ANY time demonstrate some direct interest in the woman. For the sake of me not losing my mind typing, we're gonna call any sort of direct interest shown in a woman "hitting" on her.

So you Can and SHOULD hit on every woman you approach. Notice how there is a difference between approaching a woman and hitting on her. A lot of guys out there approach women, very few actually hit on them. Even when they are doing direct openers.

Some thoughts on direct openers:

I like direct openers especially during the day time. I think that if you know how to flirt they are a great way to start a conversation especially if it's a particularly awkward situation like she's walking down the street fast or she's at a table in the corner of a restaurant. I don't however think that direct approach is the be all and end all to approaching. It is a tool, there are times it's the best choice in the situation and there are other times where it will get you immediately disqualified. The real problem between direct and indirect openers is that students tend to get really attached to one kind of opener to the detriment of the other. There is a time and place for both kinds of openers. Though in my experience direct is more efficient because girls are either interested or not almost immediately. The main guy who can benefit from a steady diet of direct approach is a guy who has made himself a 7 who can handle rejection(for real not just in his head) and doesn't want to spend a whole lot of time talking to women who aren't interested in him.

So back to hitting on girls:

The real game is the game of getting a woman to allow you to hit on her. You can talk and be interesting all day long, but if she won't let you hit on her, you're going NOWHERE.

When I say she won't let you hit on her, what I mean is this; as a conversation evolves you're going to need to express increasing levels of interest in her. This might start by saying she has a cute smile and escalate into telling her she's really turning you on, etc... Subtext is majorly overrated. You need to tell the girl you want her/ are attracted to her in order to actually get laid. But more than that you need her to accept those expressions of interest, rather than deflect or ignore them.

Because with all of our game and tactics and techniques, the woman still makes the final decision on whether or not she's interested.

In the past I've had women deflect hitting on them by saying "not on the first night" or " You can't hit on me I have a bf" and yes some of these obstacles can be overcome but really they're a good thing. If a women is not going to let you hit on her, she's not going to have sex with you. When girls deflect or ignore (as opposed to challenge which I'll address in a second) direct interest they're not worth the trouble. Sure you could try to stay in there and turn it around but if you're honest with yourself you'll know that you don't turn sets around that often (don't worry none of the gurus do either).

Now the other option is that a woman will challenge your direct interest with a tease or sarcastic comment. This is actually a good thing. Back in the day we thought women were testing us was a bad thing. Guys thought you should be sooo fucking good with women that you should just breeze through every set with complete control and awesomeness. Turns out that's not how the process works and this back and forth testing process is actually more like verbal foreplay. When a woman verbally spars with you she's testing to see if you can handle her. The implications being if you can handle her in conversation you can handle her in the bedroom. Now there are many ways to pass these tests outside of the holy couple of ignoring or agreeing and exaggerating. I've seen guys stare tests down, get crazy with the chick, tickle them etc.. The point is you have to show the girl who is boss and in some weird way that's what she subconsciously wants, when she responds to you hitting on her with a challenge.

So I gotta wrap this up to move on to other work but the main points I wanted to make were to separate direct interest from direct openers, point out that approaching a woman and hitting on her were different things and show you the 3 responses to hitting on a girl: acceptance, ignorance or deflection and challenging.

I'll have more on this as it gets more clear but using this stuff I've pulled 3 Same DAY lays in the last few weeks ( I also moved 3 blocks from a mall which helps).

More to come.

JS- The King Of Content

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

I swear I have a disease....

I HAVE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



JS

Monday, February 06, 2012

An interesting thought on delivery from Jerry Seinfeld

Hey there,

Hope everyone had a good weekend!

Mine was tarnished sightly by the Pats losing the Super Bowl but not as badly as you might think as I was convinced they would lose going in, so no biggie.

I wanted to share a quick thought on something I heard over the weekend.

There's this awesome new show on HBO called Inside Comedy or something like that hosted by David Steinberg. Their first show was about Don Rickles and Jerry Seinfeld and they had interviews with both which were pretty interesting.

The thing that stood out to me the most was when Seinfeld and Steinberg were talking about new material and how audiences can sniff it out when Seinfeld said he had a piece of material that always killed but he hated it as a joke, and one night he was about to do it but in his head he was debating and he finally decided to do it because it always got a good reaction, but this time it fell flat because even thinking about it falling flat made it so. He went on to say he was sure he delivered it the right way as well.

I thought this was interesting because I've seen the same thing with pieces of pick up material. I don't think it's any sort of "The Secret" type law of attraction BS but I do think that when you hesitate even mentally people pick up on it through microexpressions or body language or something we all tend to give away our true emotions even if we think we're masking it with good delivery.

So that's an interesting thought for the day.

JS

Wednesday, February 01, 2012

Re-Examining Pick-Up Dogma: Cocky and Funny

Welcome back to the always educational and entertaining re-examining pick-up dogma series, in today's article I want to talk about being cocky and funny.

Unlike most pick up dogma problems, this one has a clear patient x, and his name is David Deangelo(or Eben Pagen or something). David D started talking about being "cocky and funny" to Cliff of the old Cliffs List back in the early 2000s under the name sisonpyh (or hypnosis backwards) after he had been working with Ross Jeffries and they had a falling out (rumors abounded because RJ touched his girlfriend at the time,but who really knows?) sisonpyh appeared and "cocky and funny" was born.

Now to be clear I'm not evaluating the entire "Double Your Dating" methodology (which consista of getting email addresses like a retard) instead I'm focusing strictly on the idea of being "cocky and funny" which is a GREAT idea for attraction.

In fact it's one of the better frames for attraction period.

But there are some problems which I'll outline in a meandering Peter King style list with mismatched numbers and letters.

1. The Application being taught is terrible. C&F is taught as not answering questions, or giving a woman a straight answer, making fun of women instead of teasing them and a host of other terrible applications. C&F is a frame meaning that it governs behavior in an interaction. OVERALL you want to be cocky and funny in the attraction phase by joking about being awesome and making the woman laugh by being funny.

2. Not everyone can be funny. Sorry I had to say it but I keep it 100. Some people are funny, most people aren't. But luckily the funny part can be changed to playful and everyone can be playful. Playful is about being silly, and childish. But most importantly it's about not taking yourself, the woman or the interaction too seriously, you do that while being 'cocky' and you're doing pretty good.

3. Guys overdo it. C&F is good and it can get a great reaction especially early on, which can be a problem. Guys see that 1 c&f line worked well so they figure 50 must work incredibly. WRONG. Think of c&f as a seasoning like salt. Everyone loves salt, but no one would like it if you dumped a can of it on their food. 1 or 2 C&F comments in the first 20 minutes are MORE than enough.

4. Looking evasive. If a girl asks you a question once and you avoid answering it she'll laugh, but she'll also ask again and at some point you start to look evasive and shady because you're not telling her anything about yourself. It also violates the law of reciprocity.

5. David D is a dork. Unfortunately David D was a dork who didn't really get hot chicks (see my post on his wedding, do a search I'm too lazy to link) so he made up a bunch of overly harsh teases that would NEVER work in the real world my favorite being " That's a nice dress, you buy that new?" These are insults. Insulting women NEVER works write that down.

Anyway in conclusion Cocky and Funny is a great frame for attraction but you can't generate and keep attraction strictly by being cocky and funny, nor is it a complete system for attracting or seducing women.

Boom tho.

JS- The King Of Content