Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Free Report Update


 Yo yo,

 So the finalists for the Free Report Topic are:

 Drumroll please...

 1. Going Out Solo
 2. Physical Escalation
 3. Getting/Staying In State
 4. Specific types of girls (Hipsters, asian girls, shy girls etc...)

 There are also 2 different and unique ways you can vote.

 # 1 you can leave a comment as always and I'll have one of our team members go through and tally those.

 BUT and it's a big but, if you look to the side bar you'll notice there is a poll there on this very subject so you can and should also leave a comment there.

I'm going to leave the poll up a week so be sure to vote before next Wed, June 6th.

We'll be back to regular blog updates Fri but I may mention this again Monday just to make sure you vote.

 JS

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Free Report Topics?


 Hey there,

 Because I"m your friend, i'm gonna write a special report just for my blog readers.

But, since it's only for you guys, I need you to comment below and tell me what you'd like the free report to be on.  Depending on what you guys want the most I'll create an awesome report exclusively for you guys.

Be sure to leave a comment so that I can create a report on the topic MOST of you want to hear about.

 Talk soon,

 JS- The King Of Content

Monday, May 21, 2012

On Promiscuity Part 3: Getting Back At Women...


 So I was feeling very lazy last week and didn't do much, including finishing the series on promiscuity.

 To Re-cap part 1 was about boosting your self esteem and part 2 was about filling a hole in your life.

 Part 3 today will tackle guys who want to sleep with girls because something happened to them and now they want to strike back at women as a whole.

 This third guy is REALLY easy to identify.

 First of all he openly admits and brags about horrible things that no normal dude should ever admit in public, things like:

 Sleeping with a girl then deleting her phone number immediately afterwards.
 Not telling girls where he lives on purpose.
 Having girls slap him, break his car windows, destroy his clothes, personal property etc...
 Fucking an ex GF's friends/Roomate etc.
 Peeing in a girls mouth
 Being proud some girl cheated on a guy with him

 And the list goes on but I'm getting grossed out just typing these things( and yes I've done some of the less horrible things on this list but not for 5-6 years)

 But it's not just the activities he brags about it, it's how he talks about women, sex, and relationships.

 Have you ever found yourself saying things like:

 All girls are whores
 All girls cheat if a guy's game is good enough
 Women are just after a guy's money
 Girls manipulate guys all the time
 Guys get used by women all the time

 If so then it may be time to face the idea that at this point in your life you hate women. Or are a misogynist if you wanna get all fancy pants academic about it.

I've definitely hated women at times in my pick up career, I've also gone through phases where I was too into women and put them on a pedestal which is not healthy either.

 In order to get over this hatred, you have to learn to accept women as fully fleshed out formed human beings. You also have to stop making "All women" statements, because the truth is every woman is different and yes there are some women who are real assholes, but women as a whole don't all do anything. You also have to come to terms with the idea that women can do things you don't like but not be horrible people because of it. All women are not bitches because they reject you, they may just have good taste :)

 You also have to get over the way dating, sex and relationships go down. A lot of time guys focus their anger on women and want to get back at them because they are annoyed at how difficult it is a dude to date attractive women. It's not the women's fault so you have to separate the individual women from the process.  The process is often shitty, women are often awesome.

 Inherently people seek their own self interest, so we should not be offended when women do what they think is best for themselves even if this results in you getting rejected, embarrassed, hurt, or heart broken.

Or in other words hate the game, not the women.

 JS- The King of content
 

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

On Promiscuity Part 2: Filling a hole...


 Hey there,

 In part one of this series I started to talk about promiscuity and the reasons why guys in the SUISC pursue extreme levels of it.

* A quick note, I'm talking extreme levels of promiscuity/desire for such. It's quite common that I turn down phone coaching students who want to have sex with 4 new 9s a week and think that's a totally realistic, normal, rational and reasonable goal. If I have to explain why that's an issue to you, you should probably stop reading this post and go back to reading the fairy tales on other pick up guys message boards. If you just want to sleep with a few more girls and explore your options this probably doesn't apply to you.

 Part 2: Filling a hole inside of yourself.

 Tell me if this sounds familiar, you wake up, something feels wrong. There's no major issue in your life, you're not in poverty, or hunger, or being abused, but there's a subtle feeling that something isn't right. You feel unsatisfied with your lot in life, you know you deserve better than what you're getting now. You KNOW you're special, why can't other people see it? There's a gnawing feeling inside of yourself saying this is not the life I was meant to live... You know something has to change but what?

You start to look at outside measures of success...

Well if I was really ripped(Insert any other personal vanity goal here), I'd feel better about myself you might say.

 If I owned my own home, or a nice watch or got bottle service every night, I'd feel better.

 What if I was really successful or made a lot of money.

 But here's the problem, getting ripped or making a lot of money take time, and effort and energy and there's this damn feeling that won't go away while you're doing all this hard work and not getting a result.

 You want to feel better now.

 Well if you can't feel better about yourself instantly through improving yourself what would make you feel better?

All the "successful" guys you see have hot chicks with them, if you could just get a hot chick, even though the rest of your life is a mess and you don't have the discipline to fix it, you'd feel better.

Hot chicks = Success = Not feeling so shitty about yourself.

And the cycle begins.

Except the problem is this doesn't work for most guys. Most guys fail at pick up miserably and end up feeling worse about themselves.

Then the ones who are successful are hit with an awful WTF moment, when the validation all of a sudden doesn't feel as good and they start having to get laid a ridiculous amount just to not feel like a complete loser.

 But since rejection is a constant in approaching even when you're good, you start to find that you feel nothing when you succeed and feel awful when you fail.

 The attempt to plug the hole has officially failed, and your choices are despair or finding another way to feel better about yourself, when the real reason you felt bad was that EVERYTHING in your life needs to change.

This post is pretty emotional for me because I felt this way for years... Like 2005-2010.

And the reason was that I was doing the equivalent of filling a hole in a bucket with toilet paper and expecting it to stop the water from getting out. I had to realize that my whole life was fucked up starting with the puas and yes men fanboys I surrounded myself with. I needed to start to build an entire new support system that didn't care how many girls I slept with and I had to find new ways to be able to measure the progress of my life outside of whether or not I was able to stick my dick in 4 new girls a month consistently.

 That's what the hole is, it's your own knowledge that you are not progressing enough in life. You know you're letting yourself down in almost every area of your life from your health (Eating, working out, not drinking every night at da club) to your career( or lack their of) to everything. When you feel the hole and want to fill it with more pussy; your sticking point is everything in your life. And until you realize that you'll just keep trying to plug the hole with no success...

 Part 3 Friday.

 JS- The King Of Content
 

Monday, May 14, 2012

On promiscuity Part 1: Boosting Self Esteem Through Sex


 One of the things I've realized over the almost a decade I've been involved with teaching men how to meet, attract and seduce women is that everyone has their own reasons for why they want to sleep with a lot of girls.

However having said that, most guys (in the Secret Underground Seduction Community) who want to sleep with a lot of girls are doing it for 1 of 3 reasons:

 1. To boost their self esteem. I'll be discussing this today.
 2. To fill a hole inside of them (Wed)
 3. To get back at women for something that happened to them earlier in life (Fri)

 At one point or another I have had all of these motivations, which is what struck me and made me want to write about this. It's not as simple as saying "Oh well it;s evolution and guys are designed to spread their seed." First off there is a reason that evolutionary biology is not taught at any major college (Seriously go look it up). Second of all, we're all fucked up here. It cracks me up when these "seduction gurus" try to pretend that their just normal guys with no problems whatsoever they just happen to have one of the most fucked up weird jobs in a community of fucked up weird people but they aren't the issue.

 Riiiight....

 Anyway by far the most common reasons why a guy wants to "rack up numbers" is because they are trying to boost their self esteem. Women become an external barometer for how good you should/do feel about yourself.

 Here's a fun game: Next time you see a pickup guy tell him you don't think he's good with girls and see what happens. Chances are he'll start qualifying himself and talking about why he's good and how he's got hidden camera footage and etc... They freak out because their self esteem is attached to being good with women if they're not good with women (and other people don't acknowledge it as their identity) they have NO idea how to define themselves.

 This is one of the reasons I tell guys not to identify with being a "Pick up artist" because a pua is defined only through pick-up. Which basically means your entire sense of self worth is going to be at the mercy of a bunch of girls in da club.

Lame.

Not just lame but dangerous. There's a reason I tried to kill myself in my really dark PUA days it was because the only way I knew how to feel better about myself was to receive external validation from people. It's the reason some gurus have kids and still go to the club 7 nights a week. They're trying to feel better about themselves and escape their bad thoughts about how much of a loser they really are.

The thinking goes like this: If this girl was willing to let me fuck her, I MUST be cool. It's proof that I'm ok and that other people don't think I'm a loser.

The problem with this is that like any drug, the more you use the harder it is to get high. The more you validate yourself the less it starts to help. And all of a sudden if you're not sticking your dick into new pussy every single day, you start to feel like a loser anyway...

Self esteem cannot be built through interactions with other people. It can only be built through real accomplishment. It's by losing weight or getting a better job or basically being less of a loser that you're going to feel better about yourself.

 Trust me I have the scars to prove it.

 If you've ever thought you'd feel better about yourself if you slept with 10-20 or even 100 new girls this year, you are living in the clutches of boosting self esteem through sex and you need to step back and take a good long hard look at yourself. Because the dirty little secret about boosting your self esteem through sex is that it doesn't work.

Back with part 2 Wednesday.

JS- The King Of Content

Friday, May 11, 2012

Do You Make These Text Mistakes?

Hey,
 
Before I get into today's lesson, please check out Bobby 
Rio's amazing video on texting women into bed if 
you haven't already.
 
 
One of the most frustrating things is when you get
a woman's number (and she seems to be totally into you)
 
... But then after a few texts she seems to lose interest,
fizzle out, or go cold.
 
The natural reaction is to blame the woman. "She's a
flake..."
 
But if you do that, you could missing a giant crink
in YOUR GAME that is easier to fix than you think.
 
In fact, if you're like most guys than you're probably
just making one of these common texting
mistakes that will kill your chances with a girl.
 
 
MISTAKE:  Confusing Responses for Attraction  
 
Before you've had your first date with a girl, she won't 
feel much of a connection to you. As unfortunate as it 
may be, you're probably not the only guy texting her. 
 
See, a common mistake most guys make when they're 
texting a girl is that they mistake responses for 
attraction. Often when a guy is getting a response from 
a girl, he believes that he's getting closer to getting 
her on a date or to seducing her.
 
The exact opposite is true!
 
The more texts you send before meeting up with girl 
means the less of a chance you have of actually meeting 
up with her! 
 
That's right: even if a girl is RESPONDING 
to your texts, you're not getting yourself ANY closer 
to actually getting her out on a date.
 
Instead, say more with less. Whenever you're considering 
what to text a girl, see if you can say it simpler, with less 
text. 
 
Most guys send pointless texts to women like, "How's 
your day?" or "Enjoying the warm weather?" These texts DO 
NOT bring you ANY closer to a woman! They just beg for a 
response (which doesn't mean anything).
 
To make sure you NEVER again waste texts on pointless chatter, 
ask yourself this golden question:
 
How is this text bringing this girl and I closer to a date?
 
If your answer is simply "to get her to know her better," 
erase the text. It's not going to help you.
 
 
MISTAKE:  Not Conveying "Fun"
 
Here is the simple truth.  When a woman gives you her number
she is NOT signing a social contract to go out with you...
 
And until it seems FUN for her... she's probably not going
to bother meeting up with you.
 
So when you send boring texts that don't display any 
personality or don't elicit any emotions in her... in her
mind you're not worth the trouble of meeting up with.
 
Here are some signs you're NOT being fun.
 
- Am I being stiff and formal "Hi. It was nice meeting you
friday".... (too stiff. too formal)
 
- Am I putting pressure on her to keep the convo going?
 
- Am I badering her with question?
 
Remember, every text you send should make you seem like
the FUN OPTION.  The escape from her boring day.
 
So if you've been making these texting mistakes now is 
the time to STOP making them. 
 
If fact, Bobby's special video shows you exactly how you 
can accomplish everything you need to accomplish with
just three texts. 
 
 
Best, 
 
Jon

Wednesday, May 09, 2012

The Most Important Factor is Effort


 I was talking to my friend about what the most important factor for success with women and dating was the other day.

 There's quite a few things that are involved:
 Looks
 Money
"Game" or social engineering
 Emotional Connections
 Commonalities
 Status

 But I think of all those things, effort is the one factor that separates the guys who get laid a ton from the guys who do all right or fail completely.

Think about it, a guy could have great looks, or a lot of money or a lot of "Game" but if he doesn't put in a consistent effort he's not going to get the best results.

I even think back in the day Gunwitch, had an equation that was something like your looks + your effort/ 2 equals your best possible results.

So for example if a guy is a 5 and puts in a 10 effort he could end up with 7.5s. I think I agree, though there are outside factors like "game", money, and emotional connections which could boost the guy even higher without the 10 effort that (AVERAGE)guy is getting nowhere. You have to want better for yourself and then work really hard to get it.

 The worse your starting point is: Short, Fat, Old, Bald, Bad Accent, etc...

 The more effort you're going to need to put in to be successful. I remember once I had a student in 12 months to mastery who was 5'4 bald, fat and unattractive with a terribly thick Indian accent. We were talking and I was telling him he needed to hit the gym and get a vocal coach to work on the accent before he was going to see major progress. He said something to me like " That's too much work." and I went off on an old school rant about how you have to want this and he wasn't starting with the best raw material. And that's the thing a lot of you guys KNOW what you need to do to be more successful with women: You need to stop being a pussy, or lose some weight, or get out more. But you don't want to do that because it's hard. And because you're lazy. So you constantly look for the next magic pill or program that will somehow do the work for you.

 It is possible to succeed as an ugly, short, old dude I've had students do it, but they work their assess off to get that success. They try and try and try and then when they really want to quit they try some more. That's the kind of effort you need to be willing to put in if you're serious about getting success with women. Especially if you're short, ugly, poor, or socially awkward.

 JS

Friday, May 04, 2012

Developing an internal mute button


 This is kind of a weird concept, but it's been working really well for me and my phone coaching students, so I wanted to share it with the blog.

 It goes like this; we all have thoughts that run through our heads when we want to approach, during an approach, etc...

They're generally not helpful thoughts either, they're things like:

 "I hope no one sees this"
 " This isn't going well"
 "What am I gonna do next?"
 " This girl could never like me because I'm too fat, old, ugly, etc..."

 Everyone has these thoughts but the difference between guys who are good with girls and guys who aren't is that guys that are good with girls ignore those thoughts. Somehow some way, guys who are successful (And pick up nerds like myself who get there through state) manage to not engage in those thoughts or allow those thoughts to overtake them making their behavior wooden, stilted and awkward.

The thing that really made this idea click for me was when I started to try to turn the volume down on these thoughts. I couldn't instantly get rid of them, but I could make them a little quieter each time I had them. As I made them softer and softer, I started to feel better about my interactions and have better interactions more frequently.

And eventually I became able to just kinda instantly mute the thoughts as they come into my head which has made my game much better and made approaching much more fun as I can focus on the good parts instead of having to deal with bad inner dialogue.

 I encourage you to try this, start by seeing if the next time you get some of this bad internal dialogue, you can close your eyes and imagine yourself muting it like on a TV ( I know even think of a mute sign coming on in the corner). But if that doesn't work the first time, don't worry and instead try to turn the volume down on those thoughts, as even a little will still make a big difference.

 JS

 

Wednesday, May 02, 2012

Video on Upside Of Irrationality


 Hey there,

 So props to the comment monkey section for finding this video which explains what I was trying to say the other day about the Upside Of Irrationality.

So enjoy the video and comment below:


 Word.