Monday, February 27, 2012

Eye Contact

Eye contact is a tricky subject, for 2 reasons:

1. It's a pretty important "Basic" skill. Without making good eye contact, it is very hard to display confidence and you can end up looking insecure, or worse shady.

2. There's no such thing as "SEDUCTIVE" eye contact. Eye contact is important but it's not like you're going to figure out some sort of Rasputin-y eye contact magic that makes girls fall in love with you just by looking at them.

So how do we bring these two ideas into alignment?

Pretty easily actually, eye contact is MOST important on the approach, you want to make nice, comfortable eye contact with the girl/group you are approaching.

When I say nice comfortable eye contact I mean holding EC for at least 1-2 seconds before looking away. Generally you want to hold EC until the girl looks away but you want to avoid staring as that is creepy, so never hold the EC for longer than 3 seconds without looking away.

Another way to use EC is as an emphasis. If in Attraction I want to make a point, I can double up on eye contact as I'm talking. Generally as you're talking you want to make and break eye contact on that 1-3 second pattern.

With a group it's necessary to spread the EC out with the entire group rather than just stare at one girl the whole time.

To get more advanced you can start to think about what different kinds of looks you could use with EC for example giving a woman a funny look is very different than a sexy look but both require strong EC to make happen.

Hope that helps.



  1. Anonymous7:08 PM

    To add, it's helpful to when breaking the eye contact to do so in a manner of looking at something else interesting. If she's not a single, this is easy because you just break by distributing the eye contact to the friends. But if she's single, look AT something when you look away so it looks almost as if something caught your eye, so you're not just putting off the vibe that you looking away out of being uncomfortable. This may seem like it's overthinking, but its actually very natural.

  2. Hey whats up Sinn,
    Can you make a post on the difference in skill set between the less attractive girls who throw out direct interest and the attractive girls who are more ambiguous with their interest. I'm at a point where I use that direct interest as a green light to start hitting on the girl and escalating but without that waypoint on the hotter girls I get confused.

  3. Anonymous7:20 PM

    Hey Sinn, you mention that there is not "seductive" eye contact that will make girls fall in love with you and I think you're right. But not with this only. I don't know why but pretty much everyone that gets into the "community" ends believing that exists some alpha shit (super body languaje, super routine, super eye contact, etc.) that will make girls throw themselves to them because of that. And of course, reality is a little bit rougher... if you don't approach & escalate, forget about the girl. Just my 2 cents


  4. I love this subject. My game has grown quite a bit simply from improving this one element.

    Thanks Sinn.

    Dr. D.

  5. Well, i hate these advice and "what not".
    I figured out how to properly do EC by experimenting, reading acting books and watching movies, ex The wild one. Meet Joe black. He of which holds EC even for two minutes! btw, This movie is inspired by the life of Brad Pitt and how he became a demigod by being so famous around woman.

    I like about EC that the girl and you start to bound... for example, i felt butterflies in my belly' and i'm most certainly she felt too.

    the 'rule' of 1-3 seconds its good if is accompanied with a magnetic 'way' of looking at her (you'll know it when you'll experience it,its hard to explain). No sudden movements, but gently break the EC as if you're 'mmmm'... calm

    Another good example of EC you can see for yourself right now its on youtube, search for 'deadwood' and carefully see bullock's EC and calm movements.