Monday, July 27, 2009

Daisy Of Love Finale: Running Diary

What’s up guys,

I figured with all the comments and posts about Daisy Of Love last week, I’d write a running diary. So as I sit back with a bong of Blue Cheese weed and a bottle of Zephyrhills water. I invite all of you readers to follow along as we go on a wonderful journey into the land of rockerbags and the Daisy who loves them.


The following is my unedited running diary from 9-10 EST Sunday night.

The show starts off with the Morningwood’s catchy song “ Got The Best Of Me”, as always. Then we get our first confessional of the night and it’s London. London talks about how he’s trying to get every minute of alone time with Daisy he can.

The guys are packing as they’re on the way to Maui and Daisy falls down the stairs for about the third time this season.

When they arrive in Hawaii they’re greeted by Riki Rachtman (who I actually googled). Turns out he’s most famous for getting fired from Kroq radio in LA for assaulting a fellow employee who insulted his porn star girlfriend. Oh and he’s friends with Axl.

12 Pack and Flex are still hazing London by putting his pillows on their balls and wrecking his bed. They keep forgetting however that London is basically homeless, so any bed will be better than what he’s used to. It’s worth mentioning the most underrated subplot of the whole London thing is the fact that he doesn’t really have a home and lives on a couch… This will become important later.

Riki comes in and brings the guys letters from Daisy expressing her concerns over each of them. For Flex it’s his temper, which he says is “fucking bullshit” during his confessional. 12 Pack’s letter says Daisy doesn’t know how he feels about her. London can barely read his letter ( Hysterical!!!) but it says that Daisy is afraid she’s going to be in their relationship alone.

So about 10 minutes in she’s already told London that she’s 100 percent in their relationship. That kinda saps some of the mystery, no? Though London’s illiteracy is hysterical… Seriously he couldn’t read “ I’m afraid you’re going to run away.” You can’t make this stuff up folks.

Riki, now encourages them to “ Step Up Their Game” and meet Daisy on the beach in 45 minutes.

When they get to the beach they are greeted by Samoans who teach them how to paddle surf.

There’s a funny sequence where Daisy looks like she’s drunk and struggling to swim and 12 Pack rubs his man makeup before picking her up out of the waist deep water. Very romantic.

During the commercial break I see an ad for a new show called more to love which is basically a bachelor for chubbettes. I thought peopled watched TV to see pretty people that make them want to buy stuff to feel better about themselves??

The gang have a dinner while being entertained by a machete swinging Samoan waiter and a dance show that Daisy impromptly joins in with. Surprisingly Daisy dances like a stripper…

London explains that he’s not really as good at explaining himself as other people. Or reading… He also says she makes him want to be a better person.

This spurs Flex to attack him for not having a job, being 30 years old, and living with the guitar player of her band. Flex obviously read his letter very closely about not being a hot head.

12 pack stupidly brings up the letter she wrote him as the other two guys are self destructing then cannot answer Daisy when she asks him how he likes her. He chokes big time, as even Daisy is talking about how she goes for her feelings.

Flex jumps in here, with a very real speech about what he likes about Daisy. Starting with the fact that he can name 60 billion things he likes about her from the fact that she’s crazy and random to my own sexual frame of her being independent.

12 pack tries to tell Daisy that he’s falling in love with her, but it’s too little too late. He also breaks the generic compliment scale by telling her she’s both beautiful and amazing.

Daisy announces she’ll be eliminating someone the next morning and it’s looking like it’s gonna be 12 pack. Commercial break time and time for more weed.

There’s a commercial for the new reality TV show Megan wants a millionaire. Think I’ll be passing on that one. By the way when did reality TV stars become commodities. This Megan girl has been on Rock of Love and I Love Money, 12 Pack has been on I Love New York, I love Money, and Daisy Of Love. When did we stop having shows starring actors that are actors not actors that are “real people”? I need answers!

Also a great commercial for the soon to be released movie “The Good” starring Jeremy Piven (Whose girlfriend I banged when I lived in LA). That movie looks really funny.

The guys get in the limo to head to an airport for elimination. That shit is cold. I really like the elimination at the airport. VH1 keeps the pimp hand strong.

The problem with the elimination ceremony at the airport is that nobody can hear anything. VH1 has a habit of doing this so that no one can hear whose getting eliminated.

London gets chosen first to stay with Daisy, apparently she believes he’s in 200%.

12 Pack gets called up next, which leaves us breaking up the bromance between Flex and 12 pack.

12 pack flips out a little bit and storms off. The only problem being that he’s at an airfield in Maui and there’s not really anywhere to go. Daisy then adds insult to injury by coming over and asking him to at least be happy for her. Which is a really cuntish thing to say to someone you just embarrassed on national TV.

We also get a nice montage of 12 pack getting eliminated on I Love New York ( which was a good thing) and I Love Money. Apparently every time 12 Pack tells people he loves them he ends up with… A montage of airport noise drowns out his speech. Damn it now my own thoughts on love and life will never be complete without the 12 Pack perspective. I feel robbed.


Daisy and Flex have a romantic dinner in which he tells her he’s falling in love with her. Daisy believes this but only says that a part of her is feeling that too. Then it’s back to the hotel room to get their fuck on.

Cut away to London working on a song for Daisy that he promised her in the first challenge. Or really he wrote 2 lines, one of which he got from Daisy’s Myspace page.

Awww London can’t sleep since Flex hasn’t returned yet. Around 4 Am he realizes that Flex is spending the night with Daisy. Perhaps the couch he’s crashing on doesn’t have a TV or he’s unfamiliar with the way these reality shows go down.

To add insult to injury Flex ( and cause Hawaii is hot and muggy) walks back to the room shirtless.

Now it’s time for Daisy’s date with London. They’re going horseback riding. This is actually the first time I have ever seen horse back riding accurately represented. It smells like shit and you can’t talk because the horses don’t walk at the same pace… For the first time ever reality TV captures reality.

Back at the room after horse time, it’s time for the song. London is nervous to play something emotional. This song ends abruptly after talking about how he won’t run away. Daisy tells London she’s scared again ,and they makeout.

Daisy sums it up best; vulnerable hot mess, meet vulnerable hot mess.

Daisy is crying again as London leaves the room.

It’s time for the last consult with resident douchebag Riki Rachtman, who tells her London is more of a risk. Thus almost guaranteeing Daisy will pick London.

London and Flex actually agree to get along on the way to the final elimination.

Thank God Riki Rachtman is here!!!!

And we learn an actual lesson about women as Daisy tells Flex he is everything she needs right now, but that London is everything she wants.

That’s right I was right, London is the winner and immediately calls Daisy his girlfriend and talks about how he’s not even going back to Brooklyn, he’s moving in with Daisy.

Ladies and Gentleman, Attraction (even to homeless chubby band guys) is not a choice.

Now that Daisy of Love is over I have to find a new bad TV show to watch, that is depressing.

S

17 comments:

  1. Anonymous11:10 AM

    Wow, spot on prediction. You should play the lottery this week.

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  2. Dude you can't pass up on Megan Wants to Marry a Millionaire! That's the show Algasm is on.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Monstar11:26 AM

    That was a thoroughly enjoyable read sir! It genuinely made me laugh out loud.

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  4. damn sinn, you should've made a few bets on this haha

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  5. Anonymous7:33 PM

    good recap... so why do you think daisy zeroed in on to him... is it just that he matched her stereo type the most because i remember she said he was the best looking guy from the first epiode

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  6. Awesome75748:35 PM

    That was a really good read! It's really great that you include in your blog stuff like this and fuck- up reports because it really shows that you're just another down-to-earth guy

    ReplyDelete
  7. Benzene9:14 PM

    Hilarious read Sinn!! Loved the Jeremy Pivon "I banged your girlfriend in LA last year" side-note. And do you smoke weed to numb the pain of these shows or does it make them better?!?

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  8. Anonymous10:56 PM

    thxs for posting flex pic too.

    "to the hotel room to get their fuck on"...English it s not my first language can smb explain?=

    she fuck.s with flex and the next day she pick london as her big love?

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  9. Anonymous4:45 AM

    Well done!!! And thanks :)

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  10. Anonymous7:33 AM

    Jon,

    What are your thoughts on this? Why do you think she really picked London? I understand what you have said about the chemistry but was there any more beyond that? What do you think really was the difference between when she said "need" vs. "want"? Do not some women settle for men based on need (whether it be material or just some kind of void that needs to be filled - no pun intended)? I just feel like there is a piece to the puzzle missing that I am not getting (and I am sure you do).

    Your insights are always appreciated!

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  11. Anonymous9:53 AM

    I still think, if anyone, Fox is the guy to model after. That guy was so dumb he was ignorant to most shit around him, unreactive and confident as fuck. And god damn he was hot.

    ReplyDelete
  12. ゅめのプロフ作りました☆バレンタイン前なのにアソンでくれるヒトいなくて(泣)寂しいデス↓↓遊んでもイイヨ~ってヒト、メルちょうだいネ

    ReplyDelete
  13. 第60回 安田記念 2010 予想 オッズから展開と結果をズバリ当てる!出走馬、枠順など全てを考慮にいれた緻密なデータをもとに検証

    ReplyDelete
  14. 友達11:26 AM

    気楽に遊べる人募集です♪まずはお友達からヨロシクね!! freedum@docomo.ne.jp

    ReplyDelete
  15. スタービーチで素敵な愛を掴みませんか?愛に対する理想や想いを現実にしていきましょう

    ReplyDelete
  16. モバゲータウンでは今までとは一味違う出逢いを体験する事ができるのです。これまで良い出逢いがなかった人にはもってこいの無料登録型の掲示板です

    ReplyDelete
  17. スタビで出会いができる!!いつでもどこでも出会いが可能なスタービーチで最高の出会いをしてみませんか

    ReplyDelete