Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Pick Up Artist Episode 2 Late Recap...

I know, I know, I know.

I'm over a week late and should be reviewing the third episode here, but I had to sift through a million applications to 12 steps to pick up mastery and we've still got 50 applications and 25 spots... It's really hard turning down deserving guys for this program...

Any way onto the episode. I'm downloading episode 3 off Itunes as we speak, so I will get back to regular updates soon.

So episode 2 starts off with the reaction to Alex the fat guy of ambiguous sexuality getting kicked off the show. This leads to the awesome quote of " You've got to bring it or go home!" It's just like the NBA's Win or go home except it's already been broughten!!!

So after that the guys head off to the Old Age Pensioners home. Here they have to initiate conversations with geriatric old ladies as they play bingo. I'm sad this wasn't shot in Las Vegas where the Septagenerians would have come equipped with credit cards around their necks and cigarettes dripping off their lips. Wait I smoke cigarettes... scratch that last part. Here Matt really begins to shine. He says it's because he works the room at his Bubbie's nursing home. Brian makes the faux pas of saying it's awesome how the old ladies stink! Kevin reminds them of how they're old and have the best stories, and no one else embarasses themselves too badly. Matador even wears sleeves as Mystery announces that Matt is the winner of the challenge.

The winner of the challenge gets a special mystery peacocking gift from Mystery. Oh how I wished it was goggles. But alas it was a feather boa. This is an old school tactic of locking in a girl by putting an item of your clothing on her. Doesn't work especially great in real life as sometimes the girls just don't want to have your stuff on them and it can get weird if you have to keep putting a scarf, sunglasses, etc back on her. Mystery gives Matt a lesson on using it later on. It seems Erik is still teaching all the stuff he taught on my bootcamp. I wonder how he makes it all fresh and exciting for himself...

Then the guys get to learn to open, here we're treated to a dose of good old fashioned opinion openers, false time constraints and negs!!! This part was the most trippy to me of the entire show, because it's obvious that these guys need to slow down and learn how to start and maintain basic conversations before they try to pull off openers and negs. Their social anxiety is through the roof and there's no way they'll be able to SMOOTHLY execute these ideas. You can tell by the way Brian the fro of destiny( and my personal favorite part of the show) voice cracks when he's practicing his negs. LaDYYY I'm NOT going To MAKKEEE OUTTT WITHHH YOUUUUU.... All over the place. He'd be way better off learning to initiate conversations see it's not scary and then build a solid foundation of social skills. You can't neg girls when you don't believe you're cooler than them, it just doesn't work.

Now it's time for the big kill. The guys head out to Axis/Radius which used to be one of my favorite clubs in Scottsdale but now will no doubt be littered with PUA wannabes... The blowouts come fast and furious. Simieon the hyperactive guy gets the worst of them as he's told to fuck off and told he's boring another group of girls. This guy's problem is that he's scary intense. He thinks he's being high energy and playfull but it's WAY too intimidating to girls as he's basically asking them to match his intensity. He's both high energy and needy at the same time. Not a good combination. One of the guys tries a DHV story about how he beat up Andy Dick, and the girl asks him what the point of that story was. That's a oucher. I've had that happen to me especially when I first started. You have to always remember with DHV stories that they have to be cool enough to tell even if they didn't make you look good. Generally it's a better idea to lower your idea about how interesting the conversation needs to be rather than coming up with contrived fake sounding DHV stories. You always have to remember fun is the most important thing. Matt has a rough night with the boa as he pairs it with a hawaiin shirt. This is one of the most basic fashion mistakes dudes make. They pair different genres together and think that because a piece of clothing is cool in a certain style ( The boa with a goth style per se) that it will be cool matched with another style. This is simply not true. When you're getting dressed, you should always be thinking about your character and overall theme. I'ma bit of a high fashion hipster with a punk flare, Brad P's a modern rock star, Matador looks like an action hero. We all have our looks, figure out what yours is and build from there, rather than mixing and matching as Matt did. He finally gets opened overdoes the cocky and funny and ends up insulting the girl til her friends save her. We do get to hear that the boa is magic in Mystery's hands tho... Good to know that.

Kevin has decided to take a page from the drunk Sinn book and thus every third word should be fucking. I swear a lot, and this guy is making me cringe. He ends up getting eliminated.

Overall the guys did worse than a usual first night group of students on bootcamp, but I think it's the fact that they were all being forced into a classical MM mold as opposed to being allowed to experiment with different styles of openers, and different conversation techniques. They did include turning questions into statements but I'd have liked to see more on leading the conversation using questions or statements, more on keeping attention in the group etc... On the brightside for all you KJs out there, they are reusing old material so hopefully we won't get the sky is falling message board topic this year.

The show is growing on me, this episode was way better... I still don't have a good joke about Matador's pink fishnet shirt so if you come up with one email it to me.




  1. Matador's pink fishnet shirt = he's either the coolest retired stripper i've seen or he has his gay grandad's fishnet tights the wrong way around....Hey! who knows....I never judge..faz boo

  2. Anonymous5:07 PM

    So how would u have handled some of the problems they encountered, such as Simeon's blowout??

  3. Anonymous2:42 AM

    Nice, better late than never:)

    This episode reminded me of how much I hate super indirect opinion openers.
    I tend to only open with social openers, funny openers or direct openers nowadays.

  4. Anonymous4:36 AM

    good God. these recaps are better then the show.

    i liked the first season. had a sort of 'boys learning to become men' feel to it.

    but this season. what?

  5. Anonymous5:13 PM

    I think the show stepped it up this year. the early field tests are showing better results than last season. Some of the sets the guys are already running are worth studying. Everybody (community insider critics) are just negative about it, just like themselves. let it go.

  6. Anonymous4:56 PM

    I liked the contestants on the first season because they seemed like regular guys. I can't put my finger on it but the guys on this season seem really creepy. Simeon seems especially weird to me, I can understand him getting the ultimate fuck-off blowout. The other thing about Simeon is his freakin name. I had a feeling Simeon meant "ape-like or ape", sure enough Webster confirmed it (although its spelled, simian). So any girl who's worth anything (ie: well educated, professional) would think of an ape as soon as she hears his name. Talk about grounding a DLV right off the bat! LOL!