Monday, March 01, 2010

RHWOC: Queen Bees and WannaBees Applied Part 2 of 4: Alexis Bellino

Getting some good feedback on this stuff here.

I'm glad you guys are enjoying some real Female Psychology, but I've been getting a few comments about how reading this makes you hate women...

Seriously guys?

First of all the behavior we're talking about is NOT all women! It's a specific subset of women that happen to be unusually attractive(except in Vicki's case) and thus through the heirarchies involved in adolescent girl living act a certain way.

The reason this stuff is interesting is that most community guys are obsessed with "club girls." Some even demean them as people by calling them "club skanks." yet still try to hook up with them. Personally, I've been there and done that. I prefer a smarter more career/school focused girl, which is why I meet most of the girls I date long term during the day time.

Anywho, don't apply this sort of material to all women, instead use it as a guide to decipher why a certain type of girl ( Queen Bee, Sidekick, Target) is acting the way she is.

Allright on to the next RHWOC; Alexis Bellino ( If that is her real name).

Alexis joined the cast this year during the 5th season, in fact she was the first Real Housewife that has gotten introduced since I started to watch the show regularly.

Alexis has been called "Jesus Barbie" by the writer of the Pretty On The Outside RHWOC blog which is hysterical and can be found HERE

Alexis and her sloth like husband Jim have three kids and two nannies. And Alexis calls herself a stay at home Mom CONSTANTLY. She also talks about how she works out for 3 hrs a day 7 days a week. Oh and did we mention that her and her husband have taken vows to keep " God first, our marriage second and our children third."

That's normal...

Jim is gross. He's a sleazy pawn loan guy( I only know this because I googled him, Alexis dodges questions about his job like the Matrix) who dresses in Ed Hardy clothes made for someone 25 years younger. He also treats Alexis like a possession, he gives her direct commands and often tells her to stop being stupid... Like for real. It's pretty trippy to watch it. What does QBS and WBS say about this? Glad you asked:

" Getting validation from boys boosts a girl’s self esteem and confirms that she fits into the Act Like a Woman box. Girls understand that their social status and identity are tied to relationships with boys."

"Girls may sacrifice boundaries and defy common sense to please boys.

In trying to please a boy she may betray and sacrifice her relationship with other girls."

Alexis is interesting because she is a typical Queen Bee, like every other woman on this show, but she makes no effort to fir in to the already formed Vicki-Centric Social Hierarchy. In fact she makes it known at the beginning during the La Perla fashion show that she doesn't expect to become friend with Vicki.

Alexis also is super hot... By far the hottest housewife... And she has HUGE fake boobs... Like comically large. I love them... And she shows them off constantly while talking about how Jim and her have spent one night apart in 6 years and she isn't allowed to travel without him.

This becomes a huge issue and one of the first things that makes Alexis a Queen Bee.

On the ill fated Ft Lauderdale trip that Vicki planned as a girls only weekend, Alexis was the first to say she couldn't come without Jim. This was actually before another incident we'll talk about in a second involving Alexis and a cute girl who looked like Wynnona Ryder talking to Jim.

As we learned in Queen Bees and Wannabees young girls learn at a very early age that

"Girls can blow their female friends off to hang out with a boy and as long as they apologize their friends will always take them back. This is dangerous because it teaches girls that their friendships are less important than their romantic relationships."

In this way Vicki is actually an atypical Queen Bee, because she puts work, her daughter, and many other things before her relationship with her husband Donn (Who is TOTALLY the only normal person on the show.) This is where the seeds of her conflict with Alexis are sown.

The next interesting incident involves Jim and this cute Winnona Ryder looking girl chatting fairly innocently at a get together at Gretchen's. Alexis flips the fuck out and tells the girl to stop talking to her husband and back off. This leads to a huge scene. Until Jim eventually tells her the conversation is over. In those exact words. I'm surprised he didn't tell her to go to her room...

Let's look at Alexis' Qualities in Relation to what we know about QBs:

The Queen Bee:

Friends do what they want- Not so much in this group, but it could be because of her newness and the other girls personalities. For example she couldn't end the blood feud between Tamra and Gretchen. But I think they'd need Jesse Jackson for that shit.

She is not intimidated by other girls- She goes after Vicki at Waterbar in San Fransisco after several incidents like the texting thing at dinner and the snoring at Lynne's.

She complains about other people copying her, never leaving her alone, or being too sensitive- Haven't seen this yet from Alexis, but the fake christianity might be hiding it.

When she’s hanging in a group she’s the center of attention- Alexis definitely tries to make herself the center of attention as much as possible. Leading to several altercations with Vicki.

She can argue everyone down, parents, teachers included- Anyone except Jim.

She makes other girls feel special by anointing them special friends- She has tried this with both Tamra and Gretchen. It seems to be working with Gretchen, Tamra is still Team Vicki.

She’s strategically affectionate- She's gotta pay for those diamonds and botox somehow right?

She won’t take responsibility when she hurts someone’s feelings- Definitely shirked responsibility for the whole " Bitch betta stay away from my man!" scene.

If she thinks she’s been wronged she feels she has the rights to seek revenge and will do so- Absolutely as she warned Vicki to watch out at the reunion show a few weeks ago...

Whether by plot, or happenstance Vicki VS Alexis is looming as a showdown of both QBs. Vicki basically ran away, cried, talked about how her daughter might have cancer to deflect the fact that she told Alexis to bring it on before running and then even invited back Jeana( An original housewife Vicki Shit talked to death) to talk about how bitchy the new girls are.

I would say Alexis staged a small coup at The Waterbar as she got Gretchen, and Tamra to agree with her and attack Vicki as a group, much the same way girls gang up on boys in early adolescense:

" When Girls Get Mad At Guys

The most common way girls confront boys is with other girls at their side for support. This publicly humiliates the guy without her even realizing she’s doing it. It also weakens the girl's personal power as she is not standing up for herself but using group think to express her feelings, this sets her up to become a pushover when alone."

Now the question is will Alexis be able to stand up to Vicki one on one and claim the Conch shell as the QB of OC

Only time will tell...

JS- The King Of Content

PS: Tomor I'll be back with a piece on Gretchen and her feud with Tamra as well as how they and the rest of the girls fit in within an overall hierarchy.


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