Thursday, May 07, 2009

You Might be a Douchebag If... Part 2: You Pop Your Collar



What's up guys?

Thursday morning rolls around to find me in LA at Cam's apartment. As is usual when I visit Cam, the conversation turned to all things douchey...

Which brings me to my next point:

If you pop the collar of your shirt, stop. NOW!

It's super uber lame, and makes everyone think you're a loser. Plus it's like 5 years out of fashion. When I worked at Abercrombie back in 2004-5, I was asked several times to "pop my collar". I respectfully declined. For that I thank Past Jon profusely.

I don't really know what the point of popping a collar is, it was introduced to Hip Hop by E-40 of the Yay area. Coincidentally has anyone ever worked with more legends of rap while remaining relatively unfamous than E-40? Seriously... He's got songs with EVERY west coast rap icon of the last 20 years from Pac to Snoop, yet gets no love ( Oh well another post on underrated rappers is coming ) I guess popping your collar is to show you don't give a fuck.

Here's a list of better ways to show you don't give a fuck without polluting my line of sight:

1. Have unprotected sex with a native girl you meet in Africa.
2. Walk through Compton late at night screaming about how you hate black people.
3. Taser your own balls.
4. Eat leftover food out of the garbage.
5. Repeatedly bang your head against the speakers in a club until you pass out.

All of these are infinetly better.

So if you have popped a collar before, I want to reach out to you, and let you know it's not too late! You can become a productive member of society, you don't have to look like an extra from the latest little John video or like a prep who got caught in a stiff wind.

All you have to do to start the road to redemption T.I style, is throw the Polo shirts away... I'd let you keep them, but it's a slippery road from the attire of the office worker to the attire of the douche.

You've been warned!

S

15 comments:

  1. Outstanding picture!

    How awesome is it that he is also wearing a livestrong braclet? Hahahaha


    -N

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have been trying to do a review of Badboy's new DVDs but I'm having a hard time getting past his popped collar.

    ReplyDelete
  3. 06) Goto pacha and say fuck you, you italian piece of shit. Only pussys use juice. The same could be repeated in Brooklyn except outside of Italian cafes where the people are connected. And I am not talking about connected to the internet :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. MunichHawk12:07 PM

    LOL!
    I can´t agree more.
    I remember seeing an old Dean Martin music video from 1980 or so. In one scene he wore a polo with popped collar.
    This guy was surely a cool guy, but this video was from the 80ies and he´s dead for 14 years.
    So people...stop popping your collar. People who did it are already dead.

    ReplyDelete
  5. shroom12:48 PM

    You might be a douchebag if you listen to Daddy Yankee... YOU'VE BEEN WARNED..

    ReplyDelete
  6. yay, generalizations! You can definitely tell everything about someone by their clothes. That's a big time saver for me!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous1:36 PM

    And who can forget that Three Six Mafia hit "Poppin' My Collar" which also contains the lyric...

    "Ever since I can remember I've been workin these hoes."

    This only further supports the notion that Poppin' one's collar leads to "workin' them hoes".

    See the connections?

    I gotta go check my Urban Dictionary, YO!!!

    Word!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Umm, I don't really dig people making fun of Africa. So sinn, watchu sayin it's aaight to unprotected sex with anyone as long as they're not native africans?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous8:26 AM

    that go in the photo looks like a 'natural'

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sinn, you're just jealous of this guy:(Though his GF doesn't seem to mind...)

    And the article to go with it.

    ReplyDelete
  11. hehe..

    *ahem

    "I HATE BLACK PE-"

    RAT-TAT-A-TAT-TAT-TAT!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Thank you for this!! That drives me crazy. Actuall, why not cut to the chase & cut out polo shirts entirely..

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous11:30 AM

    HAHAHA! I started an "Anti-Popped Collar Club" at my college back when i was a student (during the height of the epidemic), mostly as a joke at their expense, but then to my surprise 200 people joined! HA!

    -Al

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous9:47 AM

    However, not all polo shirts are for douche bags....

    I kinda like these...no more preppy alligator, whale or polo dude. Its a rhino humping a bunny rabbit

    www.pimpological.com

    ReplyDelete