Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Contest! Create A Caption!



So I was forwarded this picture of Matador and Cajun as well as a few funny captions for it.

Such as:

“Bro. That girl just AI’ed me. THAT one. I’m so Alpha!”

“There’s Erik. I’m his ball-washer not you, and don’t you forget it”

“Try to keep your eyes open, I’m displaying my alphaness by pointing”

“You...yes YOU. Can you believe this half-asleep freak has better game than me? Ouch”

I'll add a few of my own...

" Which way is the beach? It's THAT way"

" Whoever points first is MOST alpha"

" So you're sure the gay club is THAT way..."

" Which way did the bum offering blowjobs for crack go? That way?"

Anyhoo, I'm offering a free copy of The Lay Report Book to anyone who comes up with a funnier caption than these.

Submit them in the comments.

S

77 comments:

  1. Go get those scissors little man, these sleeves are coming off NOW.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bitches love my new wig, and if they don't, fuckin' skanks.

    (Taken from the "My New Haircut" video on Youtube.)

    ReplyDelete
  3. - That's where my dick starts at

    - Pointing at a douche bag
    'you know where I from'?

    - Close your eyes & Imagine a
    Strawberry field out there..

    - Doing a sneaky nlp thing.. pointing away.. 'those men don't know how to treat you right'

    ReplyDelete
  4. sup3rdave11:25 AM

    "That's not peacocking.... check out my extensions!"

    or

    "You see those people having fun over there? That's what I want you to look like when you listen to my stories."

    ReplyDelete
  5. "BRO look it's peter pan. Let's go sarge him."

    ReplyDelete
  6. MARS MISSION11:29 AM

    Umm let's see,

    MEHOW said In PURE KINO,

    that you should be getting wood for me now.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous11:32 AM

    "I got fucking HAND IMPLANTS. Now 200% more pointing!"

    ReplyDelete
  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Bro. Check out that girl's hair...that's how I want my next wig to look like. It oozes alphaness.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous11:56 AM

    SEE THIS GUY HERE??? I'm gonna RAPE him tonight... and YOUR NEXT!

    Thats what I imagined Matador saying...

    ReplyDelete
  11. mars mission 212:23 PM

    LISTEN

    AMOG wannabee!

    Just Like I used to tell sorebottom Erik.

    You mess with the BULL you

    get the horn.

    ReplyDelete
  12. "thats the corner i wanted to show you"

    "thats where we buy our wigs"

    "thats the guy who isn't wearing sleeves look at his arms"

    ReplyDelete
  13. "You see THAT one. I'm going to go over there and do my super famous lift routine. Open your eyes man. Watch. I'm super alpha"


    "You see HER over there. I'm going to go over there with my club, caveman style."


    "I am going to over to HER and tell her I like pickles."

    ReplyDelete
  14. "there is no way HE's bigger than me."

    ReplyDelete
  15. Kasekc@gmail.com12:38 PM

    Matador Before and After.
    We have digitally altered this photo to show matador from 5 years ago(right) being held tightly by a current image of him(left). Look at how much he has changed. Phenomenal...

    ReplyDelete
  16. The more Matador extends his arm... the less it looks like he is wearing sleeves

    ReplyDelete
  17. Tell me how much those chicks want me!... uhhhh yeah! That's how daddy likes it... now tell me again!

    ReplyDelete
  18. "Make her tell me I'm the hottest guy here so I can keep my erection."

    ReplyDelete
  19. Matador: "Savoy, if i can't beat you at pick up I'll steal your instructors!"

    ReplyDelete
  20. Matador: "Bro, SHE actually said SHE was spontaneous!"
    Cajun: "...That's Tara, man."

    ReplyDelete
  21. "That's the MotherF**ker that said I wear a wig!"

    ReplyDelete
  22. “That’s the guy who told me my hair don’t look good! You better whoop his ass before my sleeves come off!”

    “Look at Simion AMOG those chicks to attract them dudes, I told him how to do that! Now all he needs is a wig..”

    “Check out Simion bro, he’s a rockstar! He’s using all the material I gave him to AMOG those chicks and make all the guys in the club want him! If only they knew what we plan to do with them..”

    “That guy stole my set! Go get Erik and the rest of the boys so we can fuck him up!”

    “Check out this new finger pointing routine dude, Sinn ain’t got shit on me.”

    “Look! That’s Sinn! He’s the guy that’s talking all that shit about me, you want to AMOG him?”

    ReplyDelete
  23. Matador: "Come close man, you know what that is out there? It's immortality! TAKE IT! IT'S YOURS!!"

    Cajun: "Isn't that from a movie?"

    Matador: "Bullshit...everybody says they're confident..."

    ReplyDelete
  24. "You see that girl over there? Erik told me she's into gay Indian cowboys!"

    ReplyDelete
  25. Matador faking a cuban accent- "Hey YOU! Say hello to my little friend"

    ReplyDelete
  26. 1)"Fuck Keys to the VIP....You look into that Camera and tell them that I am the REAL TV Star."

    2) Matador's rehaearsing for his next TV Role: WWE Superstar "Maximus Alpha"

    3) Cajun: "Ouch Stan, that Cavemanning shit doesn't work on dudes"

    4)"If you call me "Roid Rage" one more time I will pop Cajun's head off"

    ReplyDelete
  27. "I heard you and Sinn talking shit about me. We are going over to THAT bathroom. You want jelly or syrup?"

    ReplyDelete
  28. Stolen footage from the Pick Up Artist 3: Out of the Closet and onto the Dancefloor. Only on Bravo!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Anonymous2:27 PM

    I will BUY you that car if you can explain to me how you did better in 10 minute appearance on Keys to the VIP than I did on two seasons of a major cable TV show.

    ReplyDelete
  30. justintime_887@hotmail.com2:32 PM

    "Real PUAs do the opposite of EVERYTHING their mother taught them. Like not pointing at strangers"

    "Go up to Erik and retrieve my nutsack or I'll use your skinny ass as a toothpick!"

    "How many lays? Well, I've fucked him, and him..."

    ReplyDelete
  31. "Cajun...that's a funny name. That reminds me, have you ever heard of the Cajun Pepper Stick? No?!? Dude, hand me that dip."

    ReplyDelete
  32. 1) Matador: "See that, I taught HIM that..."
    Cajun: " Here we go again..."

    2) Matador: "YOU! Look at me, I'm teaching this lil' fella how to be THE MAN!"

    3) Matador to Cajun "See the guy with the broken leg over there... if u mention my wig one more time..."
    Cajun: "Wig! :)"
    ...This was the last picture taken of Cajun, if anybody has any info leading to his recovery please dial...

    Faking cuban accent again:

    4) Matador "First you get the money, then you get the power, then u get the bitches"
    Cajun: "Again with the accent?"

    5) Matador: "What? Competition? Fuck 'em all! I bury those cockroaches!"

    6) Matador: "In this country, first you get the money, then you get the power, then... u get an uber cool wig and pretend ur the shit... that's the Trump way of doing things"

    ReplyDelete
  33. "Vote NO on prop 8! Yes we can!"

    ReplyDelete
  34. Matador: "Hey you, look! I'm a protector of loved one"
    Cajun: "Loved ones? Fuck me..."

    Matador: "HEY! YOU! Come back! Look! I love little kids!"
    Cajun: "Little kids? Fuck you!"

    ReplyDelete
  35. Christian3:45 PM

    M: 'Let me point something out to you. I can bang as many drunk sluts as I want. Why you ask? My low standards in combination with my lack of sleeves. You feel me? No, I guess you wouldn't. Not with my skinny cock.'

    ::Cajun shuts his eyes::

    ReplyDelete
  36. "Uhhhh, you're making me look so ALPHA right now!! Caje man you have to try this"

    ReplyDelete
  37. Mike R4:29 PM

    Matador(to camera guy[probably Kosmo]): "Get the fuck out of here! This is MY target. I'll break your neck!"


    Matador: "Dude. Dude Cajun dude! I think that's my father!! I'm gonna hide in the leaves. Hurry man, go bring the car around!"


    Matador: *backturns Mystery* "Cajun, make big hands motions like me. Caju... Cajun! Listen, the only way Mystery is gonna fall for this jealousy-plotline is if you at least TRY to look like you're having fun!"


    Matador: "Only YOU can prevent Gay Indian Cowboy erectile dysfunction."


    Matador: "...see that right there buddy... THAT'S the reason I cut my sleeves, wear a wig, and ask questions about pickles. I'm going in. Real quick, tell me I'm alpha."

    ReplyDelete
  38. Anonymous4:35 PM

    I ... can't ... resist ... temptationn ... to ... show ...her ... my ALPHANESS ... so I'll break your neck!!!

    ReplyDelete
  39. SuperBad4:42 PM

    Hey look, there's Savoy! Can you ask him if I'm allowed back into Love Systems yet?

    ReplyDelete
  40. The Ultimate AFC4:46 PM

    Cajun - "Release me from your powerful grip!"

    ReplyDelete
  41. The Real Life Hitch5:01 PM

    Cajun: "Do I look like a drug dealer?"

    Matador: "HA-HA (in the most alphaest manly laugh u've ever heard)I like you little man, you remind me of my cock, are you adventurous? then you shall be my new sidekick, To The ALPHAMOBILE!!!"

    ReplyDelete
  42. Anonymous5:30 PM

    THERE'S my target. Occupy the girl while I game him.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Slater from Saved By The Bell WANTS YOU

    ReplyDelete
  44. "If you don't help me pick up a hot guy tonight, I'm going to beat the everliving shit out of that girl in the size zero dress."

    ReplyDelete
  45. Anonymous6:38 PM

    Bro, the restrooms are over there where I'm gonna close you man-boy prison style!!

    James.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Anonymous7:13 PM

    "Hey come over here. I want to show you something."

    ReplyDelete
  47. You see how my finger curves to the right like that? Yeah... that's how the girls like it.

    That is either Cajun's hand or the other guy's cock.

    Hi, my name is Matador. I'm so into the community, I'm IN some of the community...

    Cajun: I'm tired and having a bad night girls don't think I look like a drug dealer anymore...
    Matador: Fuck this, Obama won! YES WE CAN.

    In conclusion, I am ALPHA and you are not.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Agent_Bauer7:32 PM

    See that guy?! He has hair! I've always wanted real hair!

    ReplyDelete
  49. Agent_Bauer7:33 PM

    See that guy?! He has hair! I've always wanted real hair!

    ReplyDelete
  50. Dude, I'm so alpha my finger pulls itself. I just negged the whole club at once!

    ReplyDelete
  51. Matador mistakes Cajun for Andy Dick and wants to do coke off his chest.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Anonymous8:51 PM

    Matador: "You are my next target!"

    *Girl runs away to leap into the bed of Sinn.*

    ReplyDelete
  53. Mystery: If by my life or death I can wing you, I will. You have my fuzzy hat...
    Cajun: ...and you have my boa...
    Matador: ...and my sleeves!

    ReplyDelete
  54. Anonymous9:42 PM

    I think that girl stole my dress.

    ReplyDelete
  55. Hey wait is that guy wearing my red mesh shirt.

    - Pickup Artist 2 Episode 2

    ReplyDelete
  56. Yeah, over there! I'm telling you I left my dignity right over there...

    ReplyDelete
  57. Matador: see how Erik does it?
    Cajun: I can't see anything, your sleeve is in the way


    LOL

    ReplyDelete
  58. Hey! Hands off the Members Only jacket

    ReplyDelete
  59. "There's no better way to AMOG a guy than by giving him a rectal exam. Allow me to demonstrate, oh, and you better close your eyes because this finger's gonna HURT! ALPHAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

    ReplyDelete
  60. “GO occupy that girl so I can steal that guy from her!”

    “You notice how my finger isn’t as brown like my face? That’s because it hasn’t been up your ass yet!”

    “I want YOU to dirty sanchez that dude while I’m standing here playing with my wig!”

    “Wow I’m sorry dude, I didn’t mean to make you smell your own shit, here let me hold my finger as far away from your nose as possible.”

    Cajun: Wow I’m wasted man!
    Matador: “Good, you see that bathroom over there? Go over there and wait for me.”

    You see that barman over there? Do you think I can get him to give me a body shot?

    Damn! Look at that dude bro! He’s huge and his hair wow just amazing.. Can you introduce me to him?

    Matador: “You see THAT tranny over there? I pulled her/him the other day.
    Cajun: “Cool, I guess…”
    Matador: “Yeah soon as we got back to my Alpha crib, wigs came flying off! She/he didn’t even have to tell me how into me everyone in the club was, I stayed hard regardless!”
    Cajun: “Wow dude, you’re fucked up!”
    Matador: “I’ll punch you man, I’ll punch you!”

    ReplyDelete
  61. Matt, NY4:27 AM

    - Cajun: "I like this song too, James, but do you have to rub your dick on me so hard?"

    - Matador was pointing in two directions.

    ReplyDelete
  62. Hell, YA! Theres where the sleeves are cool

    ReplyDelete
  63. if i wasn't gay... you'd be SO mine..! ;d


    kc cajun "deliciuss"

    ReplyDelete
  64. Anonymous6:44 AM

    "hey, there's my student Sinn...
    let him watch while u feel my abs"

    ReplyDelete
  65. Anonymous7:10 AM

    Oh snap it's HB-Bull

    ReplyDelete
  66. Erik, come look at this bitch I just number closed!! Maybe SHE can take Tara's spot next year.

    ReplyDelete
  67. Matador: See that one there with the long dark hair??? What I'd do with that ass...
    Cajun: Dude, that's mystery!
    Matador: I know...


    Matador: Venusian Arts is the shit. Look into the light!
    Cajun: No, I'm good.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Smell my wig!!! Thell THEM how alpha it smells.

    ReplyDelete
  69. I want your c*ck!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  70. MaximusAlphaKManly1:05 PM

    Even though the contest is over, here's some more for fun


    Caption: "VA supports child abuse."

    ------------

    Matador: "And THAT'S the way to Brokeback Indian Mountain...."

    ReplyDelete
  71. Anonymous7:40 PM

    "You shall not pass! This Hobbit beside me and my Wig of Wonder shall stop you!"

    ReplyDelete
  72. I Want YOU



    To Fuck Me In The Ass

    ReplyDelete
  73. "Better watch yo Back, Fish! Squirrel Master aint always goin Be There for You!!"

    ReplyDelete
  74. JustCallMeDan4:59 PM

    Cajun: "*sigh* for the last time Matador... That is NOT the ring of power."

    ^_^

    ReplyDelete
  75. From Poltergeist...

    "Carol Anne - listen to me. Do NOT go into the light. Stop where you are. Turn away from it. Don't even look at it."

    Matador: "Cross over children. All are welcome. All welcome. Go into the Light. There is peace and serenity in the Light."

    ReplyDelete
  76. Matador: "Only YOU can prevent wig snatching!"
    Cajun: "Mmmm. I love a man who wears Old Spice."
    ----------------------------------
    Matador: "You..., doing the picture routine! Take a pic of me and Kirk Cameron."
    Cajun: "I can feel your Growing Pains digging into my hip. Oh boy!"
    -----------------------------------
    Matador: "Say it with me! Captain Caaaaaaaave maaaaaan!"
    Cajun: "Aaaaaand son!"

    ReplyDelete
  77. "WHO'S AWESOME... YOU'RE AWESOME"

    ReplyDelete