A quality life is more about removing things from your life, than acquiring them...
S
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Newest Podcast
Hey guys,
Here's the link, it'll be back weekly from now on.
http://sinnandthecities.com/audio/Sinn%20and%20the%20Cities%20-%2013b.mp3
S
Here's the link, it'll be back weekly from now on.
http://sinnandthecities.com/
S
Monday, June 29, 2009
LR: Sex On The Beach...
Monday has reared it’s ugly head again, and it’s time for another blog. This time I’m going to be breaking down a successful interaction that happened this past Saturday night while I was teaching a one on one student.
I don’t teach many one on ones, as I prefer to work with students on a longer term basis to maximize results. But if a student fits a certain criteria, I make exceptions. This student also was personally recommended by Priest.
The breakdown today is going to cover fashion for attraction, the importance of movement and sexual push-pull.
On the second day of the one on one, I have the student open a group of two girls standing off to the side of a walkway in an upscale hotel bar. There’s a blonde and a brunette. The brunette is short and curvy with an amazing ass. I hope the student wants the blonde.
It turns out he does.
I join the group with the classic tactic of asking if the student has seen our imaginary female friends. Coincidentally, one of my favorite things to do when I’m winging is come up fake female names for coming into my friend’s sets. I believe I used Kelsey this time.
As I’m getting introduced, the girl asks me if I’m into metal. This is not an uncommon question, because of my stereotyping through fashion. Over the years I have honed my personal style to attract a certain type of girl. This is what people don’t realize about fashion, is that you dress for the girls you want. I first learned this years before I even joined the community simply by looking at the brands and styles of clothing the guys who were with girls I wanted wore. This is something easy every guy can do. It still amazes me that guys show up to bootcamps or one on ones without having undergone a fashion and hair makeover first. And I’m not talking about fuzzy hats and highlights. Fashion is one of the first ways girl size you up, you can either make a great impression or a lousy one.
When it comes to fashion for attraction, you want to focus on having a stereotype. The girl should be able to ascertain certain things about you from how you’re dressed. She should get an idea of what kind of guy you are. Are you a jock, corporate guy, rock guy, hip hop guy, hipster, high fashion, club kid, etc… There are no shortage of attractive stereotypes out there. If you take the time to think it out and put together outfits that fit the stereotype, you will get more attraction initially and get sexual attraction from girls who see you as they’re “type”. This is what happened to me when she asked if I like metal.
I don’t need to break rapport as she’s cycling comfort questions at me which is a sure sign she’s attracted. It’s time to move her. Movement is one of the MAJOR keys to escalation. First of all it gets you into isolation, where all of the real game is going to take place. You can’t get into arousal, high compliance qualification or sexual framing in a group without making the girl uncomfortable. I tell her I’m going to grab a cigarette and invite her to join.
We finally exchange names and it turns out her ex has the same name. I reply she obviously has a type. They start asking about what other venues are good that night. I always make it my business to keep up to date with what clubs are good on any given night of the week, so I give some suggestions. At this point they’re ready to bounce, but I’m thinking we need to avoid the bounce to another club, so I invite the girl to get another drink with me and we move again. The student is also doing really well and joins us with the blonde.
I’m laying on a bed with my girl and I start sexually pushing and pulling her. The key here is fractionation and getting her to work for a sexual identity.
For example, I pull her in and as soon as she gets tense, I tell her it’s not going to work with us tonight because she’s holding back to much. I tell her she needs to be more aggressive. As I say that I push her away. She jumps on me and kisses me. But I keep the tension going by pushing her away and telling her “ That’s all you get”.
We bounce get into a hot club, but don’t want to pay cover so we end up bouncing again and end up at a beach bar. Right across from the ocean.
This girl’s logistics are messed up. She’s staying with a few other girls at her ex Boyfriend’s summer place… She has to go home at some point, because all of her stuff is there. So I now know it’s going to have to be an in venue lay or in public.
First I try to take her to the roof. No dice. Then as the student and his girl are going to find us on the roof, I tell her we should go check out the beach.
On the beach we climb on a stack of beach chairs and sex ensues.
Then the student and his girl joined us and we all went skinny dipping…
Just another weekend in my life,
S
PS: If you want to learn more about attraction techniques like stereotyping, check out the Natural Attraction DVD. You can get it at http://www.sinnsofattraction.com/naturalattractiondvd/
I don’t teach many one on ones, as I prefer to work with students on a longer term basis to maximize results. But if a student fits a certain criteria, I make exceptions. This student also was personally recommended by Priest.
The breakdown today is going to cover fashion for attraction, the importance of movement and sexual push-pull.
On the second day of the one on one, I have the student open a group of two girls standing off to the side of a walkway in an upscale hotel bar. There’s a blonde and a brunette. The brunette is short and curvy with an amazing ass. I hope the student wants the blonde.
It turns out he does.
I join the group with the classic tactic of asking if the student has seen our imaginary female friends. Coincidentally, one of my favorite things to do when I’m winging is come up fake female names for coming into my friend’s sets. I believe I used Kelsey this time.
As I’m getting introduced, the girl asks me if I’m into metal. This is not an uncommon question, because of my stereotyping through fashion. Over the years I have honed my personal style to attract a certain type of girl. This is what people don’t realize about fashion, is that you dress for the girls you want. I first learned this years before I even joined the community simply by looking at the brands and styles of clothing the guys who were with girls I wanted wore. This is something easy every guy can do. It still amazes me that guys show up to bootcamps or one on ones without having undergone a fashion and hair makeover first. And I’m not talking about fuzzy hats and highlights. Fashion is one of the first ways girl size you up, you can either make a great impression or a lousy one.
When it comes to fashion for attraction, you want to focus on having a stereotype. The girl should be able to ascertain certain things about you from how you’re dressed. She should get an idea of what kind of guy you are. Are you a jock, corporate guy, rock guy, hip hop guy, hipster, high fashion, club kid, etc… There are no shortage of attractive stereotypes out there. If you take the time to think it out and put together outfits that fit the stereotype, you will get more attraction initially and get sexual attraction from girls who see you as they’re “type”. This is what happened to me when she asked if I like metal.
I don’t need to break rapport as she’s cycling comfort questions at me which is a sure sign she’s attracted. It’s time to move her. Movement is one of the MAJOR keys to escalation. First of all it gets you into isolation, where all of the real game is going to take place. You can’t get into arousal, high compliance qualification or sexual framing in a group without making the girl uncomfortable. I tell her I’m going to grab a cigarette and invite her to join.
We finally exchange names and it turns out her ex has the same name. I reply she obviously has a type. They start asking about what other venues are good that night. I always make it my business to keep up to date with what clubs are good on any given night of the week, so I give some suggestions. At this point they’re ready to bounce, but I’m thinking we need to avoid the bounce to another club, so I invite the girl to get another drink with me and we move again. The student is also doing really well and joins us with the blonde.
I’m laying on a bed with my girl and I start sexually pushing and pulling her. The key here is fractionation and getting her to work for a sexual identity.
For example, I pull her in and as soon as she gets tense, I tell her it’s not going to work with us tonight because she’s holding back to much. I tell her she needs to be more aggressive. As I say that I push her away. She jumps on me and kisses me. But I keep the tension going by pushing her away and telling her “ That’s all you get”.
We bounce get into a hot club, but don’t want to pay cover so we end up bouncing again and end up at a beach bar. Right across from the ocean.
This girl’s logistics are messed up. She’s staying with a few other girls at her ex Boyfriend’s summer place… She has to go home at some point, because all of her stuff is there. So I now know it’s going to have to be an in venue lay or in public.
First I try to take her to the roof. No dice. Then as the student and his girl are going to find us on the roof, I tell her we should go check out the beach.
On the beach we climb on a stack of beach chairs and sex ensues.
Then the student and his girl joined us and we all went skinny dipping…
Just another weekend in my life,
S
PS: If you want to learn more about attraction techniques like stereotyping, check out the Natural Attraction DVD. You can get it at http://www.sinnsofattraction.com/naturalattractiondvd/
Saturday, June 27, 2009
The Meaning of Communciation is...
The response it gets.
It doesn't matter what the intentions are, it doesn't matter what you were trying to convey or express, none of it matters.
What makes communication effective is how it is interpreted by the other person.
Nothing else.
S
PS: Yes, I know this is a vague post but the person who needs to see this, will.
It doesn't matter what the intentions are, it doesn't matter what you were trying to convey or express, none of it matters.
What makes communication effective is how it is interpreted by the other person.
Nothing else.
S
PS: Yes, I know this is a vague post but the person who needs to see this, will.
Friday, June 26, 2009
The "Cock" Game
Hey guys,
One of the biggest problems I've been seeing with students over the last few bootcamps, is the inability to generate state from within. AKA they don't know how to have fun!
When I go out with my friends, or alone I always come up with fun games to play to get myself laughing and happy. I.E in state.
Here's one that my friend Moxie and I play all the time. It's called the "Cock" game. The idea which is based loosely on the movie "Waiting" and loosely on a running joke about Johnny Soporno, is this. You want to while talking convince the other guy to look over while you scream "COCK" and point at your genitals. Not the most sophisticated idea I know, but results are hysterical and lead to state in an easy way...
It gets even funnier when you're in set with girls and decide to play the game with the girls...
The idea to get out of this post is that you NEED ways to get yourself into state when you're out. It's too important to leave to chance and you need to find ways that amuse you in doing that.
Have a good weekend,
COCK!!!!
S
One of the biggest problems I've been seeing with students over the last few bootcamps, is the inability to generate state from within. AKA they don't know how to have fun!
When I go out with my friends, or alone I always come up with fun games to play to get myself laughing and happy. I.E in state.
Here's one that my friend Moxie and I play all the time. It's called the "Cock" game. The idea which is based loosely on the movie "Waiting" and loosely on a running joke about Johnny Soporno, is this. You want to while talking convince the other guy to look over while you scream "COCK" and point at your genitals. Not the most sophisticated idea I know, but results are hysterical and lead to state in an easy way...
It gets even funnier when you're in set with girls and decide to play the game with the girls...
The idea to get out of this post is that you NEED ways to get yourself into state when you're out. It's too important to leave to chance and you need to find ways that amuse you in doing that.
Have a good weekend,
COCK!!!!
S
Thursday, June 25, 2009
The Value Paradigm
Hey guys,
Today, I want to talk about one of the bad thought loops running around the seduction community. The idea that all of life and personal development comes down to the idea of survival and replication value.
What happens usually is that guys find the SUISC after being badly hurt by women or the idea of women. So they want some way to explain the way some women act. At which point they turn to the community and are told that being high value is the key to success in every situation.
This starts a descent into what I like to call the value paradigm. A head space where every move you make is analyzed through the filter of retaining or building social value at all costs. Drug dealing club promoters are now seen as the highest value guys one can get to know. People are sized up for what value they can provide you. Guys who are living by the value paradigm forget about things like being a good person, being happy, and instead chase value anywhere they can find it.
At a conversational level people living in the value paradigm will subtley try to find out how you can help them. This can range from an LA golddigger asking you what kind of car you drive, to a guy asking casually if you know his friend Al who runs such and such bar. Guys in the SUISC who live through the value paradigm viw every second they are not dominating the conversation as if they're losing oxygen. They try really hard to maintain their frames and demonstrate value constantly. They also have a tendency to look try hard when mentioning their travel stories, or ex girlfriends who were strippers in situationally irrelevant manners. They also have a tendency to not be able to vibe without an agenda.
The value paradigm can be a hard one to escape. Especially if you've been in the community awhile. The first step is to purposely choose the lower value option later in an interaction with a woman. Maybe 15-25 mins in make a self deprecating joke, or let the girl lead the conversation for awhile and just ask questions. Small steps can lead to big progress if you are willing to work hard at this and use some common sense.
S
Today, I want to talk about one of the bad thought loops running around the seduction community. The idea that all of life and personal development comes down to the idea of survival and replication value.
What happens usually is that guys find the SUISC after being badly hurt by women or the idea of women. So they want some way to explain the way some women act. At which point they turn to the community and are told that being high value is the key to success in every situation.
This starts a descent into what I like to call the value paradigm. A head space where every move you make is analyzed through the filter of retaining or building social value at all costs. Drug dealing club promoters are now seen as the highest value guys one can get to know. People are sized up for what value they can provide you. Guys who are living by the value paradigm forget about things like being a good person, being happy, and instead chase value anywhere they can find it.
At a conversational level people living in the value paradigm will subtley try to find out how you can help them. This can range from an LA golddigger asking you what kind of car you drive, to a guy asking casually if you know his friend Al who runs such and such bar. Guys in the SUISC who live through the value paradigm viw every second they are not dominating the conversation as if they're losing oxygen. They try really hard to maintain their frames and demonstrate value constantly. They also have a tendency to look try hard when mentioning their travel stories, or ex girlfriends who were strippers in situationally irrelevant manners. They also have a tendency to not be able to vibe without an agenda.
The value paradigm can be a hard one to escape. Especially if you've been in the community awhile. The first step is to purposely choose the lower value option later in an interaction with a woman. Maybe 15-25 mins in make a self deprecating joke, or let the girl lead the conversation for awhile and just ask questions. Small steps can lead to big progress if you are willing to work hard at this and use some common sense.
S
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Enemy Vs Ally centered existances
One of the things that I notice immediately now when I meet people, is how they define themselves in the world.
There's the obvious ways people do this like being positive, negative, thrill seeking, etc...
But it goes deeper, one thing I notice a lot in students especially ones who experience a little success, is that they live enemy centered existences. Every guy is a "chode" to be blown out. Every girl is a " bitch" to be brought down a peg. When combined with another unhealthy thought pattern taught in community known as the " Value paradigm". You become a really nasty person to be around. I know cause I used to do the same things. The problem is it leads to a lot of problems. You will alienate a lot of people ( I used to), you'll miss out on a lot of cool people because they are not cool based on the community's model of "high value" and ultimately you will end up alone.
Instead you want to adopt a ally based viewpoint. You want to assume people are going to be friendly to you( you're usually right), you want to assume that people will be happy to talk to you, and that the girl's friends will help you hook up with her. Tim from RSD has talked about the idea of seeing cheerleaders instead of obstacles. This is about seeing friends not enemies and acting accordingly. I mean you wouldn't be nervous talking to friends right?
Tomor I'll write about the value paradigm and how that can harm you as well...
S
There's the obvious ways people do this like being positive, negative, thrill seeking, etc...
But it goes deeper, one thing I notice a lot in students especially ones who experience a little success, is that they live enemy centered existences. Every guy is a "chode" to be blown out. Every girl is a " bitch" to be brought down a peg. When combined with another unhealthy thought pattern taught in community known as the " Value paradigm". You become a really nasty person to be around. I know cause I used to do the same things. The problem is it leads to a lot of problems. You will alienate a lot of people ( I used to), you'll miss out on a lot of cool people because they are not cool based on the community's model of "high value" and ultimately you will end up alone.
Instead you want to adopt a ally based viewpoint. You want to assume people are going to be friendly to you( you're usually right), you want to assume that people will be happy to talk to you, and that the girl's friends will help you hook up with her. Tim from RSD has talked about the idea of seeing cheerleaders instead of obstacles. This is about seeing friends not enemies and acting accordingly. I mean you wouldn't be nervous talking to friends right?
Tomor I'll write about the value paradigm and how that can harm you as well...
S
Monday, June 22, 2009
Incongruence revisited...
Hey guys,
I'm sure that I've written about incongruence before... Mystery has a famous video on it and what not, but I still see incongruence as a MAJOR problem for most guys trying to get better with women.
Incongruence happens when what you say, who you present yourself to be, or how you say things does not match up. It's what happens when an overweight guy in his 30s approaches a group of 20 somethings stumbles through an opener while barely making eye contact and then accuses the girls of hitting on him...
Quite simply, it's not going to fly.
One of the things that stood out this weekend at the final 12M2M bootcamp was just how different certain lines and techniques come off with bad delivery.
Take for example the idea of playfully calling girls out for bad behavior. When done correctly, not only does this help build attraction, but it demonstrates dominance as well. However it's not something you can do every interaction. It has to be situationally relevant or it comes off as uber weird... Seriously imagine giving someone a firm handshake and having them scold you on it... Or imagine them bringing up the idea of the handshake 3 minutes later...
One of incongruence's favorite allies is situational irrelevance. What that means is that what you're doing is irrelevant in the situation. This is one of the major ways guys come off weird. And something that can be tough to develop if you lack it naturally. It usually happens if guys never had a default way to communicate their personality before learning pickup. These are the guys who neg your girlfriend or try to amog they're bosses...
Another thing to think about is the emotional expression behind the lines and techniques themselves. Without the proper emotions ( or illusion of emotions) tactics and techniques do not work. That's why one of the most important attraction switches is emotional honesty. Girls must believe that you're saying what you're saying because that's how you feel here in the moment. Imagine a blank faced sociopath walking up to a group of girls and telling one of them her last boyfriend didn't spank her enough. Scary...
And lastly think about the type of guy people think you are and the type of guy you're trying to portray yourself to be. There's a lot of guys out there who try to portray themselves as these big players with stripper ex girlfriends, who get in fights etc... While looking like a guy who works at the local blockbuster. You have to be able to convince people you are who you're portraying yourself to be. And best of all you don't all have to portray yourselves to be someone you're not to get attractive women. It's a matter of utilizing strengths and masking disadvantages.
Hope that helps explain incongruence a bit more clearly, if you get blown out a lot you and you are starting to think the material doesn't work for you, you're probably incongruent.
S
I'm sure that I've written about incongruence before... Mystery has a famous video on it and what not, but I still see incongruence as a MAJOR problem for most guys trying to get better with women.
Incongruence happens when what you say, who you present yourself to be, or how you say things does not match up. It's what happens when an overweight guy in his 30s approaches a group of 20 somethings stumbles through an opener while barely making eye contact and then accuses the girls of hitting on him...
Quite simply, it's not going to fly.
One of the things that stood out this weekend at the final 12M2M bootcamp was just how different certain lines and techniques come off with bad delivery.
Take for example the idea of playfully calling girls out for bad behavior. When done correctly, not only does this help build attraction, but it demonstrates dominance as well. However it's not something you can do every interaction. It has to be situationally relevant or it comes off as uber weird... Seriously imagine giving someone a firm handshake and having them scold you on it... Or imagine them bringing up the idea of the handshake 3 minutes later...
One of incongruence's favorite allies is situational irrelevance. What that means is that what you're doing is irrelevant in the situation. This is one of the major ways guys come off weird. And something that can be tough to develop if you lack it naturally. It usually happens if guys never had a default way to communicate their personality before learning pickup. These are the guys who neg your girlfriend or try to amog they're bosses...
Another thing to think about is the emotional expression behind the lines and techniques themselves. Without the proper emotions ( or illusion of emotions) tactics and techniques do not work. That's why one of the most important attraction switches is emotional honesty. Girls must believe that you're saying what you're saying because that's how you feel here in the moment. Imagine a blank faced sociopath walking up to a group of girls and telling one of them her last boyfriend didn't spank her enough. Scary...
And lastly think about the type of guy people think you are and the type of guy you're trying to portray yourself to be. There's a lot of guys out there who try to portray themselves as these big players with stripper ex girlfriends, who get in fights etc... While looking like a guy who works at the local blockbuster. You have to be able to convince people you are who you're portraying yourself to be. And best of all you don't all have to portray yourselves to be someone you're not to get attractive women. It's a matter of utilizing strengths and masking disadvantages.
Hope that helps explain incongruence a bit more clearly, if you get blown out a lot you and you are starting to think the material doesn't work for you, you're probably incongruent.
S
Thursday, June 18, 2009
You're not special...
Hola , appreciators of fine pick up content.
I was thinking about something yesterday, some students I've been working with have been having a rough time and they seem to think that there is something special about them that is making their path to mastery harder. And the truth is there isn't.
At some point during all of this you will all feel like you're not good enough, or that you'll never understand this, or even that god himself is conspiring to keep you from getting laid ( I'll be honest that last one was me).
It's not you, you're not a special snowflake that is going to go through a different path than everybody else. Nobody is 100% confident 100% of the time. So it's important that when you have those moments of insecurity to remember that everyone even the hot girl you want to talk to, or that cool guy who gets all the girls feel the same way at some point in their lives.
Hope that helps,
S
I was thinking about something yesterday, some students I've been working with have been having a rough time and they seem to think that there is something special about them that is making their path to mastery harder. And the truth is there isn't.
At some point during all of this you will all feel like you're not good enough, or that you'll never understand this, or even that god himself is conspiring to keep you from getting laid ( I'll be honest that last one was me).
It's not you, you're not a special snowflake that is going to go through a different path than everybody else. Nobody is 100% confident 100% of the time. So it's important that when you have those moments of insecurity to remember that everyone even the hot girl you want to talk to, or that cool guy who gets all the girls feel the same way at some point in their lives.
Hope that helps,
S
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Follow Me On Twitter!!!!
Hey what's up guys?
Today I wanted to remind you guys that you can follow all of my stories, updates, and newsletters by following me on Twitter:
http://twitter.com/TherealSinn
Hit me up on there!
S
Today I wanted to remind you guys that you can follow all of my stories, updates, and newsletters by following me on Twitter:
http://twitter.com/TherealSinn
Hit me up on there!
S
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Mehh....
Been a super busy couple of days after the NYC bootcamp ( which featured a hysterical cameo from Julian Foxx)
I'm back in Miami now and trying to get myself back to neutral after back to back bootcamps. I honestly wonder how I did this every week for almost two years. I know I'm not old, but bootcamps make me feel it. I used to be able to bounce back but now I'm fucked for 3 days.
In fact it's 3:00 PM and I'm just getting out of bed on a Tuesday.
It doesn't help that while I'm off being a traveling vagabond pick up teacher, I still have bills, parking problems, and girls to deal with.
A buddy of mine texted me last night inviting me to a client's b-day party at a strip club and I couldn't go because my 4 girl rotation was not so happy with my surprise 2 week trip to Vegas and NY. In fact starting in an hour or so I have to see 2 girls today and 2 girls tomor...
I'd complain but no one wants to hear about that, so instead I'll talk about how much I now love NYC. Which I know will annoy the long time reader who has read posts about my hatred of NY. It's called evolution people :P Anywho I love the city now and will probably split the next couple of years between Miami and NYC. But we'll see I still have miles to go before I can start making life plans. Plus I'm going to Brazil in Nov and may never come back...
Allright I'll start posting some more content soon, but I wanted to let everyone know I was alive. Even if I barely feel it :)
Happy Tuesday!
S
I'm back in Miami now and trying to get myself back to neutral after back to back bootcamps. I honestly wonder how I did this every week for almost two years. I know I'm not old, but bootcamps make me feel it. I used to be able to bounce back but now I'm fucked for 3 days.
In fact it's 3:00 PM and I'm just getting out of bed on a Tuesday.
It doesn't help that while I'm off being a traveling vagabond pick up teacher, I still have bills, parking problems, and girls to deal with.
A buddy of mine texted me last night inviting me to a client's b-day party at a strip club and I couldn't go because my 4 girl rotation was not so happy with my surprise 2 week trip to Vegas and NY. In fact starting in an hour or so I have to see 2 girls today and 2 girls tomor...
I'd complain but no one wants to hear about that, so instead I'll talk about how much I now love NYC. Which I know will annoy the long time reader who has read posts about my hatred of NY. It's called evolution people :P Anywho I love the city now and will probably split the next couple of years between Miami and NYC. But we'll see I still have miles to go before I can start making life plans. Plus I'm going to Brazil in Nov and may never come back...
Allright I'll start posting some more content soon, but I wanted to let everyone know I was alive. Even if I barely feel it :)
Happy Tuesday!
S
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Does There Have To Be More?
Hey guys,
It's been a long couple of days.
I'm in Vegas right now after teaching a bootcamp for 12M2M and working with one of my private coaching students yesterday.
I was talking with one of the students and it got me thinking about the idea of more, and internal validation.
One of the things that is fairly common among students, is that they always expect that there is going to be more.
Allow me to explain, the concept of more. When students first find the SUISC they assume that there is more than meets the eye to it. They expect that there are some sort of secret routines, tactics, or knowledge out there that can fix them instantly.
IMO there are two reasons for this.
1. Because cold approaching strangers is a ridiculous notion and fairly hard in real life, guys actually make it harder for themselves by assuming that there is a magic pill out there that will fix them.
2. Most guys aren't actually doing approaches, so when they start to and see that it's not all marshmellows and rainbows, they assume it's a lack of knowledge rather than practice. Remember there is a MAJOR difference between intellectual understanding and applicable skills. Most of the time, once you have a structured way to practice game, more knowledge will not help you. 100 more approaches will.
The next time you feel like you're missing some sort of knowledge about game, ask yourself if there has to be more.
S
It's been a long couple of days.
I'm in Vegas right now after teaching a bootcamp for 12M2M and working with one of my private coaching students yesterday.
I was talking with one of the students and it got me thinking about the idea of more, and internal validation.
One of the things that is fairly common among students, is that they always expect that there is going to be more.
Allow me to explain, the concept of more. When students first find the SUISC they assume that there is more than meets the eye to it. They expect that there are some sort of secret routines, tactics, or knowledge out there that can fix them instantly.
IMO there are two reasons for this.
1. Because cold approaching strangers is a ridiculous notion and fairly hard in real life, guys actually make it harder for themselves by assuming that there is a magic pill out there that will fix them.
2. Most guys aren't actually doing approaches, so when they start to and see that it's not all marshmellows and rainbows, they assume it's a lack of knowledge rather than practice. Remember there is a MAJOR difference between intellectual understanding and applicable skills. Most of the time, once you have a structured way to practice game, more knowledge will not help you. 100 more approaches will.
The next time you feel like you're missing some sort of knowledge about game, ask yourself if there has to be more.
S
Thursday, June 04, 2009
The Basics Of Story-Telling
Hey guys,
Here's a feature from my newsletter where I breakdown the real life nuts and bolts of common skills and ideas related to meeting and attracting women.
Before we’ve tackled topics like Day Game, Approaching Groups, and Phone Game.
Today we’re going to breakdown story-telling.
Story-telling is a great social skill. In my Natural Attraction program I talk about how there are 4 characteristics that attract women. One of them is the ability to be interesting. Being interesting doesn’t refer to having a million hours of routines or being some sort of Richard Branson esque-alpha male. Instead it refers to having the ability to carry on an interesting conversation. Story-Telling is one of the most important of these conversational skills.
So let’s get into the basics:
Length is key to your story-telling. An attraction story should be between 30 and 90 seconds. Any shorter and it’s going to be hard to make an impact. Any longer and you run the risk of boring the girl(s).
Always start with the end of your story in mind. It’s very important to have a definitive ending to your story, so that the girl(s) know it’s their turn to respond.
A good attraction story should end on a laugh, a “that’s interesting” or a “aww”. Any other reaction you’ve done something wrong.
Characters are key to your stories. You want to make sure to describe your characters in detail. Make sure to focus specifically on what the characters look like, sound like, and what they’re overall stereotype would be.
Be Succinct. Guys tend to focus too much on small details, be willing to cut your story down to bare facts and emotional language.
Use Emotional language. Make sure that you describe things using your 5 senses. Talk about what you smelled, heard, felt, touched, tasted etc… Be careful not to take this too far as you can end up sounding like a cheesy romance novel writer wannabe.
Use lead ins. Lead ins are how you start to tell a story to a new girl or group of girls. A great way to lead in is with a set phrase like “ The (Weirdest, Craziest, Funniest, Randomest) thing happened to me today.
Use check ins like “ Has that ever happened to you?” “ You have been there right?” “ You Know what I mean.” This is to make sure that you are keep the girl(s) involved and attentive.
Lastly lower the bar of how interesting you think your stories have to be. Your compeitition is not the most interesting man in the world. It’s the “ where are you from/what do you do guy?”
Hope that helps you guys clean up your story-telling,
Talk to you guys soon,
S
P.S. Reminder: tonight is your LAST CHANCE to get your copy of the Day Game from A to Z Mastery Program before it goes off the market. So if you’re on the fence, NOW is the time to act. Get it and EIGHT amazing bonuses by heading over to http://www.getdaygame.com
Here's a feature from my newsletter where I breakdown the real life nuts and bolts of common skills and ideas related to meeting and attracting women.
Before we’ve tackled topics like Day Game, Approaching Groups, and Phone Game.
Today we’re going to breakdown story-telling.
Story-telling is a great social skill. In my Natural Attraction program I talk about how there are 4 characteristics that attract women. One of them is the ability to be interesting. Being interesting doesn’t refer to having a million hours of routines or being some sort of Richard Branson esque-alpha male. Instead it refers to having the ability to carry on an interesting conversation. Story-Telling is one of the most important of these conversational skills.
So let’s get into the basics:
Length is key to your story-telling. An attraction story should be between 30 and 90 seconds. Any shorter and it’s going to be hard to make an impact. Any longer and you run the risk of boring the girl(s).
Always start with the end of your story in mind. It’s very important to have a definitive ending to your story, so that the girl(s) know it’s their turn to respond.
A good attraction story should end on a laugh, a “that’s interesting” or a “aww”. Any other reaction you’ve done something wrong.
Characters are key to your stories. You want to make sure to describe your characters in detail. Make sure to focus specifically on what the characters look like, sound like, and what they’re overall stereotype would be.
Be Succinct. Guys tend to focus too much on small details, be willing to cut your story down to bare facts and emotional language.
Use Emotional language. Make sure that you describe things using your 5 senses. Talk about what you smelled, heard, felt, touched, tasted etc… Be careful not to take this too far as you can end up sounding like a cheesy romance novel writer wannabe.
Use lead ins. Lead ins are how you start to tell a story to a new girl or group of girls. A great way to lead in is with a set phrase like “ The (Weirdest, Craziest, Funniest, Randomest) thing happened to me today.
Use check ins like “ Has that ever happened to you?” “ You have been there right?” “ You Know what I mean.” This is to make sure that you are keep the girl(s) involved and attentive.
Lastly lower the bar of how interesting you think your stories have to be. Your compeitition is not the most interesting man in the world. It’s the “ where are you from/what do you do guy?”
Hope that helps you guys clean up your story-telling,
Talk to you guys soon,
S
P.S. Reminder: tonight is your LAST CHANCE to get your copy of the Day Game from A to Z Mastery Program before it goes off the market. So if you’re on the fence, NOW is the time to act. Get it and EIGHT amazing bonuses by heading over to http://www.getdaygame.com
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
The Double Edged Sword Of Intelligence And Meeting Women
Hey guys,
What's Crippilating?
I was thinking the other day about the relation between intelligence and success with women.
What I've noticed is that in general there is an opposite and inverse reaction between how intelligent you are and how well you do with women pre-seduction community. Not to say NO smart guys consistently get girls outside the SUISC, simply an observation.
I bring this up, because obviously all of you guys reading this are smart. Stupid people tend not to go looking for answers to their love lives on the internet.
Being smart is a good thing overall obviously, but there are some very common pitfalls the intelligent fall into when dating. I want to outline a few of them for you here, you may find you do one or more these things.
1. Making excuses. This is the biggest thing, the smarter the guy, the more likely he is to rationalize why he shouldn't approach a girl, escalate the conversation, get a phone number, etc... And guess what? A lot of your excuses are going to be correct. However at the end of the day, every time you make an excuse, you miss out on an opportunity.
2. Over-thinking things. Once upon a time I had a student ask me what word to playfully push the girl on when telling her we weren't going to get along. He asked if it were " We are NEVER (push) going to get along" or " We ARE(push) never going to get along". There were more variations but you get the gist :) Smart people overcomplicate things. Especially once they get a little bit of knowledge in their heads. Whereas before when you were talking to a woman and she said something, you had NO idea what it meant... Now you see tests, and DHVs, and body language OH MY!!!! And by the time you're done sorting through all that to actually respond with the perfect thing... The girl is bored and leaving. Remember the SOA slogan " Less Thinking, more making moves."
3. Wanting to understand everything before being able to practice. This is the curse of the " Prepared" guy. He wants to study all forms of pickup, learn every line, and know the evolutionary reasons behind said techniques. The truth of the matter is, in the beginning more knowledge actually hurts you. In 12 Months To Mastery we still have not presented the students with the full model. And several students are racking up 3-10 lays a month. Why? Because they don't know any better. They just try things, and see what happens. So they have learned for themselves how THEY typically will go from meeting a girl to getting her into bed. This also helps develop natural logisitics skills as I constantly harp on them to think for themselves. Instead of asking a question or looking for an answer, make a mistake and see what doesn't work first.
4. Believing You are Better Than You Are, Because You Understand Theory. This is a huge one. Intellectual understanding and actual real life profeciency are two VERY different things when it comes to picking up women. If you read a couple of books and study a few systems for picku up, you could become a master of the knowledge involved in as little as a month depending on reading speed. However it's still going to take you 1-3 years depending on your overall social skills, natural advantages, practice habits, goals etc to get really good at cold approaching. This is probably not the case in other highly intellectual fields like computer programming and engineering where if you understand all the theory and processes, you can do them at will. You always want to make sure that you're real life application skills are better than you're knowledge of social dynamics...
5. Being uncomfortable with touching and escalation. Savoy once pointed this out to me. It seems very consistently the guys on bootcamps who had problems touching girls were the ones with the loftiest degrees. It seems the higher the level of education the less comfortable with touching and escalation. I don't know if it comes from the culture of these institutions or the demands on time, etc... But the correalation is there. Again this probably traces back to overthinking things or trying to solve all the possibilities instead of manning up and not being afraud to get rejected.
Hope that helps ya,
S
What's Crippilating?
I was thinking the other day about the relation between intelligence and success with women.
What I've noticed is that in general there is an opposite and inverse reaction between how intelligent you are and how well you do with women pre-seduction community. Not to say NO smart guys consistently get girls outside the SUISC, simply an observation.
I bring this up, because obviously all of you guys reading this are smart. Stupid people tend not to go looking for answers to their love lives on the internet.
Being smart is a good thing overall obviously, but there are some very common pitfalls the intelligent fall into when dating. I want to outline a few of them for you here, you may find you do one or more these things.
1. Making excuses. This is the biggest thing, the smarter the guy, the more likely he is to rationalize why he shouldn't approach a girl, escalate the conversation, get a phone number, etc... And guess what? A lot of your excuses are going to be correct. However at the end of the day, every time you make an excuse, you miss out on an opportunity.
2. Over-thinking things. Once upon a time I had a student ask me what word to playfully push the girl on when telling her we weren't going to get along. He asked if it were " We are NEVER (push) going to get along" or " We ARE(push) never going to get along". There were more variations but you get the gist :) Smart people overcomplicate things. Especially once they get a little bit of knowledge in their heads. Whereas before when you were talking to a woman and she said something, you had NO idea what it meant... Now you see tests, and DHVs, and body language OH MY!!!! And by the time you're done sorting through all that to actually respond with the perfect thing... The girl is bored and leaving. Remember the SOA slogan " Less Thinking, more making moves."
3. Wanting to understand everything before being able to practice. This is the curse of the " Prepared" guy. He wants to study all forms of pickup, learn every line, and know the evolutionary reasons behind said techniques. The truth of the matter is, in the beginning more knowledge actually hurts you. In 12 Months To Mastery we still have not presented the students with the full model. And several students are racking up 3-10 lays a month. Why? Because they don't know any better. They just try things, and see what happens. So they have learned for themselves how THEY typically will go from meeting a girl to getting her into bed. This also helps develop natural logisitics skills as I constantly harp on them to think for themselves. Instead of asking a question or looking for an answer, make a mistake and see what doesn't work first.
4. Believing You are Better Than You Are, Because You Understand Theory. This is a huge one. Intellectual understanding and actual real life profeciency are two VERY different things when it comes to picking up women. If you read a couple of books and study a few systems for picku up, you could become a master of the knowledge involved in as little as a month depending on reading speed. However it's still going to take you 1-3 years depending on your overall social skills, natural advantages, practice habits, goals etc to get really good at cold approaching. This is probably not the case in other highly intellectual fields like computer programming and engineering where if you understand all the theory and processes, you can do them at will. You always want to make sure that you're real life application skills are better than you're knowledge of social dynamics...
5. Being uncomfortable with touching and escalation. Savoy once pointed this out to me. It seems very consistently the guys on bootcamps who had problems touching girls were the ones with the loftiest degrees. It seems the higher the level of education the less comfortable with touching and escalation. I don't know if it comes from the culture of these institutions or the demands on time, etc... But the correalation is there. Again this probably traces back to overthinking things or trying to solve all the possibilities instead of manning up and not being afraud to get rejected.
Hope that helps ya,
S
Monday, June 01, 2009
Day Game Madness!!!!
Hey guys,
It would be an understatement to say that things have been pretty crazy since we officially launched the Day Game from A to Z Mastery Program last Thursday. In case you’ve been wondering why you have not gotten a million emails from me since we launched it’s because didn’t want too many orders to go through because of issues we were having with our merchant account. Let me explain...
Basically orders were flying in much faster than we anticipated and we exceeded the monthly volume on our account. Instead of being happy about this, our merchant account company shut down our account soon after we launched.
This is why so many people were not able to get their orders processed correctly. We thought we resolved this issue, but then we got shut down AGAIN when more orders came through. Trust me, I REALLY wish I was making this up.
Anyway, I finally got the OK from the risk department at the merchant account company and he assured me that there will be NO MORE ordering issues.
Because of this technical mishap, there is no way to accurately track exactly who is eligible for the early mover bonuses. So here’s what we’re going to do…
1. If your order has been successfully placed up to this point, you’ll automatically get access to the special Q and A teleseminar and the flake elimination toolkit. I’ll do as many Q and A calls as I have to do. That’s only fair.
2. Everyone else who orders within the next 24 hours will get the Flake Elimination Toolkit for sure. After that, I have to take all the early mover bonuses off the market for good.
So If you want to get your hands on the Flake Elimination Toolkit, you need to get your order in IMMEDIATELY.
You do not want to miss out on that because it’s worth more than the entire program itself. Get it (and EIGHT other amazing bonuses including admission into the $997 Sinns of Attraction Super Conference) by placing your order now:
To all the new Day Game Mastery owners, welcome aboard! I promise that you are going to look back on investing in the program as being one of the best decisions you ever made.
I’m so proud of the program. It’s literally five years of my research, study and THOUSANDS of real life interactions condensed into one easy-to-follow system guaranteed to get you big results. You’re going to love it!
Best,
Sinn
P.S. If you have not gotten your Day Game Program yet, I suggest you run over to http://www.getdaygame.com and place your order right now while it’s fresh on your mind and before anything else comes up!
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