Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Guest Post By My Friend Sara: The Problem With Guys with Too Many Girl Friends

So last week I wrote about the issue with girls with too many male friends.

I mentioned that if I were a girl I wouldn't trust a guy with too many female friends either. This of course caused a ruckus among my friends because 95% of my friends are girls.

My friend Sara(who is hot and too smart to sleep with me) read the post and ranted at me that she wanted to write a post on why a guy is "Bad news" if he has too many girl friends. She also claimed I was too biased to write such an article because I'd spend half the time defending my own behavior. Which is probably true.

I believe this is the first guest post by a girl on my blog.

Take it away Sara:

Why I would never date Jon, or a guy who has mostly female friends.

I've known Jon or "Sinn" for almost two years at this point. And while I really love him as a friend, I would NEVER date him. It's not because of the "Pickup Artist" stuff either.

It's because he ONLY hangs out with girls. I'm dead serious when I say that in the entire time I've known him, I've seen him with guys twice. Every time I meet up with him for a drink or go to the same parties, I know he's going to have his little Blondtourage with him. And that's fine because we're just friends. But if we were dating, it would be a real issue.

I honestly think that the girls he dates just ignore the obvious evidence. If a guy is ALWAYS hanging out with other girls who he says are "Just friends" that's a huge red flag in a relationship. His last GF who I won't name cause he'll just edit her name out (Jon's Note: Would Not) knows the girl he slept with after they broke up pretty well. She's had dinner with her a bunch of times and while Jon claims he never cheated, he always has "friends" who he ends up sleeping with after break-ups(Jon's note: Or when I'm bored.).

This is typical of ALL men with a lot of female friends. To be fair to Jon he does have a decent amount of female friends that he is just friends with. Some of them are married, others are in relationships and his best friend is a lesbian. But the main problem with dating a guy with lots of girl friends is that you don't know which is which. I know that there is nothing going on with Jon's main 3 BFFs Kelly, Raine and Carrie. But I also hear rumors every other week about Jon and this girl or that girl in our group. Girls who "date" him hear the exact same rumors they just choose to ignore them or they fall for Jon's technicalities that since they're not really exclusive or "together" he can sleep with other girls as well and she can't get mad.

It's just not trustworthy. If you're in a relationship, why do you need attention from all these other women? Jon would say that he gets along better with girls than guys and that's sort of true. But he's ignoring the fact that he's WAY more interested and interesting when he talks to girls. If he put the same effort into meeting and being friends with guys he'd have a big group of guy friends. By holding on to this group of female friends he's basically keeping one foot out of the relationship.

Ultimately having a big group of female friends as a guy will undermine your relationship and lead to a situation where you have to choose your friends or your girlfriends.

The main reason I would never date Jon is that I know he'll choose his friends over a GF every single time.
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Thanks Sara!

While I'm recovering from having Sara strum my pain on her fingers, I do have to agree with most of what she said. If I was a girl there is 0% chance I'd be ok with the amount of girls I hang out with.

She's also definitely right about the one foot out thing as I am aware of what girls I'm friends with like me even when I'm in a relationship and I do flirt.

So yeah.

JS

16 comments:

  1. Anonymous4:25 PM

    I would like to know about the straight girls who has a lot of gay guy friends.I would like to hear about your opinion and your friends opinion.

    The girl I like always hung out with gay guys.I mean not just one person,this is third time.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Tyler (not the ginger faggot from RSD)4:26 PM

    Sinn being all proud of having all these female friends makes him sound kinda feminine. I'm not a hater; I think Sinn really knows a lot about picking up women. However, I wouldn't be so proud of being "one of the girls." There really is a lot of benefits to having more male friends, dude. Maybe you didn't have strong male role models or something growing up?

    Anyway...to each his own.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous5:13 PM

    how sweet :)

    Do you loose your manliness if you hang out with nearly only women?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous6:05 PM

    Sinn, you wrote this, nobody else did.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous6:33 PM

    I'll take johns word for it. most guys barely have any female friends, much less a giant blontourage :D. I know I'm one and working on having a blontourage myself ^^

    As for the girls response, I saw this in my face last week through a friend who's girl is a bartender. He chatted up the new girl because she talked to him first and bam his girl had her emotions go off on him and she started ignoring him. All this from simply her point of view on things. The guy didn't even talk sexual, it was just regular small talk! I now truly understand that women will be women and if you roll with women alot they will always have their emotions array and fear it.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Tattoo7:12 PM

    I have a bit oposite problem,since being in the whole PUA thing i almost dont have any female friends,i know a lot of women but theire all
    targets or past lays or FBs and i have a few friends who are in the pick up for a while with the same problem.
    The intresting thing is before the pick up
    i had looooots of female friends
    and of course almost no sex.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous10:03 PM

    Sinn mentioned before he has gay brother so he probably naturally gravitates towards feminine people ;)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Seiya3:09 AM

    lol ur a sports guy.. watch ball, do ufc.. how the hell dont u hang out with guys.. comes-off weird..

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous3:10 AM

    Sinn, please elaborate: I too have mainly girls as friends and I think it starts to become a problem. A lot of these girls treat me like I am sexually interested in them, but I am not. I just cannot stop the flirting! What the hell!?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous5:39 AM

    Nice one, also too much of a wuss to allow any comments that are negative too. Not capable of engaging with your audience eh Sinn?

    You wrote this. You know you wrote this.

    I wonder just how many other negative comments you don't let through every day because you're too much of a pussy to engage with your audience and defend against criticism.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous8:30 AM

    jon i'm a cool dude you can be my mate and then everything is sorted!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I agree with the article. But to add on, the guy should be able to hang with bros too, from a balance perspective. Having a network of both girl and guy friends is much more helpful then having alot of friends of one gender.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous2:25 AM

    This is a cool article you got. You basically intentionally post this article to DHV to the community guys that you got plenty of girls on your social circle to give yourself more credibility.

    Yea yeah, you prob reply with the comment: "most community guys already know i have plenty of credibility", but the thing is, unless you're mystery, more credibility doesnt hurt to get more clients.

    Good job :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous9:17 AM

    Is that why your voice inflection is like most girls (going higher at the end of sentences like its a question), you're extremely catty/sarcastic/argumentative/attack based on emotions not facts, and you have a poor sense of humor?

    ReplyDelete
  15. Dude this is by far one of the best blog posts in a while. You cover a lot of different aspects of life (and game etc.)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Anonymous10:14 AM

    I like Sara. It's always a help to have a woman's perspective on this shit, even if they can't teach it ;) and one chick's perspective is just one chick's perspective.

    Also, ease up on the homophobia, gents. Not a good look for a bunch of "players." Not at all.

    ReplyDelete