Monday, July 30, 2012

Attention And Commitment to The Conversation > Opening

 Lately I have realized more and more that guys focus on the WRONG things when it comes to starting conversations with women.

Namely they focus on what they are going to say rather than getting a woman's complete attention.

"Opening" as it was defined is about starting a conversation but it doesn't really do you any good to start a conversation with a woman who is only half paying attention to you.

This is especially true during the day time as often women are not sure you're talking to them unless you make it explicitly clear by asking for her full attention.

One of the reasons guys are soooo into direct game is because of the side effect to a direct approach that you engage a woman's full attention. There's nothing inherently special about direct but it does force you to fully commit to getting a woman's attention and as such some guys feel they do way better because of it.

Correlation not causation at it's finest.

So you know you need to get a woman's attention, but every guy reading this has had the experience of getting a woman's attention saying one or two things and then having the girl turn back to her friends, her cellphone or her shopping.

The reason for this is because attention is only one half of successfully getting a conversation started. The other half is getting the woman committed to the conversation. You have to get her to actually engage in the conversation quickly or you're just going to get good at opening.

Sometimes this happens easily and women are quick to joke or play back. Other times you have to actually ask the woman to commit a few minutes to talking either through an isolation attempt in a group or simply asking her if she has 5 mins to talk at the bookstore.

Your opener doesn't matter half as much as these two things and the sooner you stop focusin on what you're going to say and start focusing on how you're going to get her attention and commitment the better your game will become.

JS- The King Of Content


  1. Anonymous5:31 PM

    Good post. Rob judge teaches the same about getting a woman's attention first when starting an interaction which I agree as well.

  2. That is definitely, i think that great communication on both part is the key for a good relationship. Some people now don't even seem to like commitment or are trying to avoid it.

  3. BoozerX12:36 AM

    How do you open a girl in a group of girls dancing like crazy in a very loud club where you can't hear your own voice?

    How do you get the partygirls attention or getting her to commit?

    Do you have to do something really outrageous?

  4. This makes sense. Without her attention you won't get enough out of her for you to start an interesting conversation.