LR: Return of the Pirate King???

This report was from last Thurs night.

I had a date with an internet girl and was reminded of why girls sometimes need to date on the internet. But we'll rewind further to about 6 PM.

I get a call from a number that usually I just get sent to voicemail when calling. It's Captain Jack. He's been super uber busy with some new business shit so I haven't seen him in probably 2 months or so. So not only do I get a call but he's thinking about going out tonight to the Cowboy bar. You know, the one where last time I was there I got hit in the head with a beer bottle. I'm angered, because I have this internet girl coming over in a few minutes and can't go. So I tell him I'll try to kick the girl out quicker and get over there.

So she shows up and she has made liberal use of her pictures... Apparently they were 6 months out of date and this girl has eaten the cute girl in the pictures. So I fire a text message to one of my female friends asking her to text me a way out message. This is something I do with all my female friends, the basic idea is that whenever you or any of your female friends go out on dates. You guys check in on each other at a certain tim, and if anyone wants to get out of the date you send a text saying your car broke down and you need help. So it's a cool little thing to take care of your female friends and have them bail you out when help is needed. My friend AnnaFerris girl gets the text this time, and I show the lying internet girl the text and bounce home. Then I text CJ to make sure he's still at the Cowboy bar. He is, and I grab a cab up there.

I immediately remember what I don't like about this venue as the smell is indescribable. It's like dirty, dry, tobacco mixed with something else gross. Also everyone is dressed like a frickin cowboy, and line dancing. Fun times. But CJ is there and it's great to be back hanging with him. The drinks start flowing as they are apt to do and we start doing some approaches. I start the rotation of glory. For those of you that don't know the rotation of glory is something Moxie and I came up in Vegas to make sure that you approach the hottest girls in the club. You start at the 12 o'clock position in the club and make a full lap tagging the most attractive sets. Then systematically approaching them one at a time. So we're doing the rotation when I pounce at the two hottest girls in the bar. It goes VERY badly as one of the girls actually dances away, CJ looks at me like " need help?" and I laugh and tell him when the girls dance away it's probably not a good time to wing.

Time for the next set, actually time for three more drinks since CJ's been talking to his other best friend Patron. I'm standing outside the bathroom waiting for CJ when a hot girl comes by wearing some sexy cowboy vest type outfit. I claw her in and say she's adorable and I want to meet her, because I usually hate vests but she makes it look hot. I pull her in for a side hug, and she puts her arm back around me, which means it's on. I actually end up having a lot of chemistry with this girl and things start to escalate very quickly. It turns out she just turned 21 and her friends aren't old enough to come to the bar yet... So she's here alone and drove. AKA SNL requirements are met. I move her to the other side of the bar and mention that my ride just left with a girl. Which is made even funnier as CJ is standing about 15 feet away. This girl is actually awesome, she's bisexual, completely blunt and honest, smart, and doesn't have any pretense whatsoever. We make out, and since I'm working on some of the Flawless Natural I tell her it's " You and me tonight". That goes over very well and we start making plans to head back to my place.

We park and head up to my place where she tells me that her girlfriend left a hickey on her boob and she doesn't have a boyfriend.

It also turns out that CJ pulls this night as well, so hopefully that's a sign of things to come. I'll be posting a series of unposted LRs from myself and other guys for the next month leading up to the launch of The Lay Reports Book Sept 14th.

S