Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Be proactive!

I've been scanning the boards lately and almost every post is begging for help without actually going out and trying anything!

If you are ever going to get good at this stuff, you are going to have to rely mostly on yourself. Everything is a choice and you are constantly going backwards or forward. You can choose to stay home because you don't have anybody to go out with, or you can go out alone. You can try to get a phone number from every set even when they don't seem to be going well, or you can eject and feel good about approaching. You can call the numbers you get or you can avoid doing so.In the end you need to push yourself.

Bootcamps are an amazing kick start because you see what the final puzzle looks like from watching instructors, you get a great handle on whta you need to be working on, and you get out there and start approaching. But the bootcamp is useless unless you continue to follow up hard. At the end of the day you can get laid both nights of bootcamp, but if you stop going out, you will stop learning.

You have to discipline yourself. I make to do lists before I go out. On them I put the things I want to do and avoid doing. Then when I hit the bars, I just go down my list.

Open set before I order a drink- Check
Don't eject until you've tried to qualify- Check
Approach the hottest sets in the venue-Check
Approach at least 1 mixed set- Check
Try to move every set- Check
Push sexual frames- Check
Number close 25 mins in-Check
No more than 4 drinks- Check
Seed bounces- Check

That's all I'm thinking about, I don't focus on routines or what to say or whatever. Instead I just go down my list. I proactively police myself to make the right choices. The thing with discipline is, it's one thing to know what you want to do. It's quite another to actually do it. I know personally I've planned to go out and do approaches only to sit around drinking. You have to know what your intent is for going out. If you're going out to drink, drink. If you're going out to game, game. But make sure you know what you're doing and you act congruently to the goals you have.



  1. fader7:25 PM

    No more then 4 drinks eh ;)

  2. That is a nice solid post.

  3. Excellent post.We gots to get up off your ass and do it

  4. thank you for this jem

  5. Juice Terry6:08 PM

    Exceptional post.
    Very instructive-kudos.

  6. You always have a way of cutting through the BS. A drink or two does help those of us with approach issues.

  7. Anonymous12:49 AM

    ur mo prophylactive

  8. I love the checklist. I need to make one for myself as well. Thanks for all the badass stories Sinn.

  9. Awesome checklist sinn. Thanks again.