Are you a closer?

Are you a closer?


One of the biggest mental hurdles, I have ever had to deal with, was being willing to push and make things awkward. Looking back now, I don’t worry about it, but when I was starting out I had all sorts of bullshit in my head about how long it takes to sleep with a girl, how much work you have to put into it, how some girls weren’t “like that” etc…

Looking back now I see that it was all complete bullshit!!! The only difference in my results now vs my results then, was how far I was willing to push.

We’ve all had those “ Oh shit” moments where you realize the girl likes you, but you have no idea what to do next. You figure that if you sit there and build comfort for the next 4 hours, maybe you’ll be able to get a phone # and see her again or bounce with her and her friends, or steal her away to your PUA lair.

Bad, bad, bad. In order to get the results you want, you need to be a fucking closer. Like Mariano Rivera. That means leading and knowing where you are going. TMM is an amazing roadmap, as you know the steps to get a girl into a sexual relationship. But there is more to it than just the Emotional progression model. Which brings me to;

Mistake # 1. Not knowing what outcome you want from the interaction. Do you want a ONS, you better start seeding that bounce. Do you want to get a bunch of phone # s and follow up that week? You better start some merging some sets. What a TON of guys do wrong is they try to dogmatically adhere to the structure of TMM and they forget about what they want to do with the girl they are talking to.

Solution: Figure out what you are trying to do with this girl, before you approach her… Is your goal to get into deep comfort and do a date? Or is it to try to pull her into the bathroom. Both goals require different implementation and more importantly different levels of aggressiveness.

Mistake # 2 Not closing EVERY set you are in for some purpose. If the girl doesn’t respond sexually, or I seems like she might flake, # close her ANYWAY. Worst case scenario you can practice your phone game. Best case scenario it turns out you can’t read minds and you and she get together.

Solution: # close every set you are in, that doesn’t blow you out.

Mistake # 3 Trying to finesse sets. This was my MAJOR sticking point for most of my PUA career. I probably didn’t ask a girl for her # directly for like 2 years. Instead I would bait and if the girl didn’t take the bait, I would bait again. Most of the time this works, and it IS more solid if she offers her # rather than you asking. But some girls need to be asked, because they aren’t socially brave enough to be the agrressor. Or they don’t want you to think they are a slut.

Solution: Try to finesses things, but don’t be afraid to use force, or social pressure. Don’t underestimate the power of telling a girl what to do.

Mistake # 3 Not setting up dates before hand. If you seed the date or bounce, things will go A ot smoother. In my head there is a ticking clock to 25 minutes so I know when to get her # if it has happened organically already. It doesn’t mean I leave the set, but it means I get her contact info incase the bounce doesn’t work or we get separated. Don’t lose sets you don’t have to.

Solution: Make sure you get a phone # at the 25 minute mark.

Mistake # 4 Not escalating physically. All our routines are just bullshit baffles brains to disguise our escalating of touch. Make sure you touch early, touch often and keep escalating. Try to make out with every set you are in for more than 15 minutes. Women will actually respect you more, the more you aren’t afraid to touch them. It is much better to be the touchy guy than the cool guy who waits to touch her. Show her you are a leader and a closer.

Solution: Learn a touch progression and follow it every time. Don’t be afraid to pull the trigger.


Mistake # 5 Listening to objections. Myth busters time, there is no such thing as the perfect pick up. In every interaction, you will get some clunkiness where a irl will give you reasons she can’t come home with you or meet up etc… Don’t ever logically acknowledge these. Instead tease her, touch her, make out with her and lead.

Solution: Next time you get an objection ignore it and lead her to the conclusion you want. Change her mood, not her mind.

Avoiding these mistakes will get you well on your way to becoming a hardcore closer not just a PUA.

S