Thoughts like these is how depression works. Dealing with them is how depression gets cured. There's tons of literature about this. Check out "Feeling Good" by David D. Burns. Should definitely be helpful since you will recognize some of these unhealthy patterns in most of your clients.
I never muted those thoughts. I was thinking about them as mental noise because those voices are not true, becuse your brain is not fucking medium. It is ust random shit that goes through head while you are doing it anyway. No need to working on them in my opinion.
Sinn, I also like what you have to say about fear and confidence. What your brain is doing is sending a fear response, a response that isn't that rational since talking to girls isn't very dangerous.
Once you have approached consistently and have seen you aren't going to get assaulted or permanently embarrassed, the messages from your brain should go down, or will be much easier to just tolerate.
Great post buddy. Yeah things like affirmations and rituals I believe also helps stop those thoughts. You can train your mind into believing certain things that can help not hinder you. I've watched a lot of boxing lately and those guys constantly say things out loud and to themselves to create intense self-beliefs that give them confidence and so on. They also know how to re-frame thoughts, get rid of negative incoming ones and so on.
Ablaze (The best comment monkey on this blog. Period!)12:11 PM
I work several different sales jobs and "developing an internal mute button" is pretty much the same thing that I do in sales. I need to be focused on what's going on in front of me so having a bunch of negative self talk swirling around in my head distracts me from the moment. It's also hard to fully commit to something when your mind won't stfu.
I think it's harder to do when picking up, though. If someone rejects what I'm selling, they're not really rejecting me, they're rejecting my product or service. In pickup, they're rejecting me. It takes a higher level of awareness and maturity to deal with rejection when the thing being rejected is yourself.
Thoughts like these is how depression works. Dealing with them is how depression gets cured. There's tons of literature about this. Check out "Feeling Good" by David D. Burns. Should definitely be helpful since you will recognize some of these unhealthy patterns in most of your clients.
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I never muted those thoughts. I was thinking about them as mental noise because those voices are not true, becuse your brain is not fucking medium. It is ust random shit that goes through head while you are doing it anyway. No need to working on them in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteSinn, I also like what you have to say about fear and confidence. What your brain is doing is sending a fear response, a response that isn't that rational since talking to girls isn't very dangerous.
ReplyDeleteOnce you have approached consistently and have seen you aren't going to get assaulted or permanently embarrassed, the messages from your brain should go down, or will be much easier to just tolerate.
Great post buddy. Yeah things like affirmations and rituals I believe also helps stop those thoughts. You can train your mind into believing certain things that can help not hinder you. I've watched a lot of boxing lately and those guys constantly say things out loud and to themselves to create intense self-beliefs that give them confidence and so on. They also know how to re-frame thoughts, get rid of negative incoming ones and so on.
ReplyDeleteI work several different sales jobs and "developing an internal mute button" is pretty much the same thing that I do in sales. I need to be focused on what's going on in front of me so having a bunch of negative self talk swirling around in my head distracts me from the moment. It's also hard to fully commit to something when your mind won't stfu.
ReplyDeleteI think it's harder to do when picking up, though. If someone rejects what I'm selling, they're not really rejecting me, they're rejecting my product or service. In pickup, they're rejecting me. It takes a higher level of awareness and maturity to deal with rejection when the thing being rejected is yourself.
Good post.
I wish that keyboard jockey Ablaze would kill himself. Seriously. Get a life.
ReplyDelete